Page 42 of While the Sun Shines

“I’m in,” Abelardo says. “Pen?”

Drew studies a drop of water sliding down his glass. Across the kitchen, there’s the glug of liquid, the sound of Penny swallowing, and the firm slap of a shot glass hitting the counter.

Drew ducks over his own glass. She’ll go, he’s sure. Good, so he can stay here.

And what—wait to listen for when they come back? Have to sit with his teeth clenched and stomach churning as he imagines what they’re all talking about? I’m out, I’m moving, I’m done with the farm and my life here and especially done with Drew, Penny would probably be telling them while he sits here alone.

“I’ll come,” he blurts out. Oh, shit, he didn’t mean to. But the alcohol’s singing through him now, turning the slick of worry into words before he can think them through.

So he trails the four of them out into the fields, Cooper and Whit holding hands, and Penny and Abelardo walking far in front of them. Abelardo curls his arm around Penny’s shoulders. Kisses the top of her head as they walk.

Drew pushes his hands into his pockets and stares at his own feet so he doesn’t have to watch, his cheeks burning.

The swimming hole isn’t much more than a section of the creek that he and Cooper long ago tried to expand into a pool, rolling slippery stones up against the bank and building a dam laced with tree branches. It’s still too small to be truly comfortable for all of them and too cold to really enjoy.

Cooper kicks his boots off anyway, tosses his shirt onto a tree branch and wades in. He dips his head beneath the water and rises up again, whipping hair out of his face and soaking Drew in the process.

“Thanks,” Drew says, plucking at his shirt.

“C’mon, boss man,” Cooper says and flicks more water at him.

“Careful or I’ll write you up.”

“Farm reg forty-six point three, no discipline shall be metered out, ever, but especially when we’re having fun. Now take your fucking clothes off.”

“Is this how he treats you?” Drew asks Whit.

There, that’s normal. Feels close to normal anyway, closer than the heat still burning at his cheeks and how careful he feels of Penny.

“Nah, don’t have to ask him twice,” Cooper says with a wink.

And no, he doesn’t, because Whit also strips down to his shorts and wades into the water, pushing past Cooper to sit on one of the far rocks.

Penny goes in too with a quiet yelp, wearing just her running shorts and a sports bra. She quickly ties her hair up in a knot on top of her head, her arms held above the surface of the water and gooseflesh standing out on her skin. Abelardo follows her, and Drew lingers on the bank, only slowly unlacing his boots. Did she—did she already tell Abelardo what he said? Have she and Cooper talked about it? Does even Whit know at this point? The giant elephant in the room, bigger than Drew can even guess?

It feels like there’s barely room for him when he wades in, the water cold enough to shock his breath, but Cooper scoots over to sit on Whit’s lap. Though that leaves only so much space, since Penny took the other flat rock that he and Cooper had long ago hauled into place.

So there’s only a jutting log beneath the water’s surface to perch on, and he works his foot against the stones of the creek bottom to hold himself in place so he doesn’t drift against Penny’s side.

“This is a gorgeous spot,” Abelardo says. “You really made this?”

“Should’ve made it bigger,” Drew says.

“It’s perfect,” Abelardo says.

Thanks, Drew should say. Instead he just manages a nod.

Be fucking normal, he tells himself. It’s all the more awkward to not be able to shake away the stiltedness of his words and the stiffness in his body. And even the alcohol, however much Cooper crammed into those drinks, doesn’t seem to help. Drew’s heart is beating too fast and his entire body is twitchy, like he’s poised to run.

A splash of water catches him in the face.

“Start having fun or I’ll do it again,” Cooper says.

Drew should laugh. Splash him back. He just wipes at his eyes and blinks until he can see clearly again.

“I’ll hold him down if you want to get him back,” Whit says, already reaching out for Cooper’s arms and drawing him close.

“Oh baby, the two of you. I’ve waited my entire life for this.” Cooper says with an exaggerated wink.