Page 87 of Reins

Maybe this time I’ll make enough noise for her to hear me when I come down the drain?

Nope. I promised her no pressure. I don’t mind taking matters into my own hands if it means I’m gaining her trust.

Part of me hopes that one day she’ll get brave or curious and come in here with me.

Even if she doesn’t join me in the shower, she can watch and see what she does to me. Then I can make her bite those pretty lips as I meet her eyes and groan my way through another release with her name spilling out of me.

Fuck, the water was barely warm before I got off that time.

When I step back into the bedroom with wet hair and empty balls in nothing but a fresh pair of jeans and an unbuttoned white shirt, I’m surprised to see her still lying there awake. She usually goes back to sleep.

“Cade?” Her voice is low and her gaze averted.

That often means she’s anxious about something.

I toss my dirty clothes in the basket and crawl back over the mattress to cuddle her through the blanket. “Yes?”

“What does it feel like?” she whispers.

I’m not exactly sure what she’s asking. “There’s still plenty of hot water.”

“No…” She traces the vein in my arm with her nail. “The other part.”

My breath catches in my chest. I have an idea of what she’s hinting at but want no doubts. The last thing I want to do is give her wrong information. “You’ll have to elaborate, Ros. I’m not sure what you’re talking about?”

Her nose wrinkles, making her forehead furrow. “I don’t, um. I’m not sure.”

Propping my head on my palm, I can see the confusion and frustration rippling through her features.

With a sigh, she turns to face me. “What does it feel like when you…you know.” Her fingers make a little swirl in the air.

My lips purse, measuring my words as one brow raises. “Is that the technical term?”

“You’re making this hard.” She pouts, covering her eyes with her elbow.

That makes me snort and I almost drop a very bad joke. “Why don’t you just explain so I don’t fuck up the answer?” I’m struggling not to laugh as her intention gets clearer.

If she wants me to go into detail about sex—

“What does it feel like to orgasm?” She clamps her other arm over the first, completely hiding her face.

I’m glad she did, or she’d see the look of horror that crosses mine.

Ice rushes through me at the terrible truth.

She was probably punished.

That changes my entire mood.

“Rosalyn.” My throat is as dry as a desert. “You’ve never—”

Her head shakes under her arms. “Mama caught me once,” she whimpers.

“Even after she was gone, you didn’t…” I let my question trail off. I should know better.

Rosalyn spent her entire life fearful, even of a woman long dead.

I’m so glad today is the first appointment with the therapist.