Page 80 of Almost Ours

“I know you’re saying that.”

She makes a tiny noise that could be annoyance, but she still doesn’t lift her head, so I bring both hands up and cup either side of her face. My palms cover most of her cheeks, my thumbs rest just below her eyes as I slowly coax her head back.

Ruby resists at first, chin tucked stubbornly towards her chest, and I don’t force it. I just keep my hands there, rubbing my thumbs across her cheeks until eventually she gives in and lets me lift her face towards mine.

Her eyes are wet.

Fuck.

The sight of it punches straight through me.

“Hey,” I murmur, bending my head so I can catch her gaze when she tries to look away. “Don’t hide from me.”

“I don’t want to cry all over you.”

“You can cry if you want, I won’t judge.”

“I’m sorry.”

I’m perplexed. What has she got to be sorry for? “Why?”

“Because I basically threw myself at you, and then my brother—”

“Hey, hey.” I say as she tries to look away. “Stop it. I don’t want you to say sorry for that shit. I just want to know you’re okay?”

Ruby presses her lips together. I can feel her trying to pull herself back under control beneath my hands. I hate it. I don’t want her to think I’m someone who expects her to be anything other than herself

“I’m alright,” whispers. “I just hate when he does that.” She grips my top with one hand. “It’s like they’ll never let me grow up.”

I still don’t get it. It’s fucking weird. And I’m the king of dysfunctional families. “Your family have always been like this?”

She gives a small shrug. “Yeah. I think they forget I’m not twelve anymore.”

Truthfully, Oscar seemed more pissed than is normal. “That’s all it is?”

She nods quickly. “He panics.”

I study her face, trying to decide whether I believe her, but her eyes are still wet, and I don’t want to turn this into another interrogation. “Alright.” I nod, certain she’s playing it down but deciding to drop it. I stroke her cheeks and she closes her eyes, leaning into my palms in a way that makes my heart constrict. “Do you want to do something today?”

“Like what?” She croaks, looking at me.

“I don’t know.” I shrug. “Anything. Get out of here for a bit?”

“You don’t need to do that because I’m crying.”

“I’m not. I want to spend the day with you.”

She softens. “Really?”

“Yeah. Why is that so hard to believe?”

“I don’t know, Josh. Sometimes I can’t tell if you like me at all.”

“Ruby Hollis.” I tilt her face back towards mine, making sure she looks at me. “There isn’t a thing about you I don’t like.”

Her eyes are filled with uncertainty, needing some kind of reassurance that she isn’t selfish, or bad, or unlikeable.

So, I do my best to give her what she needs. “I really like spending time with you. I like that you say whatever the fuck you’re thinking. I like that you’re nosy and irritating, and you make me do things I would never usually do. I like that you can make me laugh when I really don’t feel like laughing.” My thumbs keep stroking her cheeks while I hold her in place. “I like being near you, Rubes. There’s a reason I find an excuse to see you every day.” I lean forward and press a light kiss to her forehead, then gently pull back. “Whatever bad things you think about yourself—don’t ever mistake any of it for how I see you, because it isn’t. Not even fucking close.”