Page 31 of Almost Ours

Ruby lets out another snort beside me before quickly disguising it as a cough.

"Don't encourage her," I murmur.

"I'm trying not to."

Jess shakes her head at us like we’re both idiots. “Nobody ever believes me.”

“It's not that we don't believe you," Ruby says carefully. "It's more that..." She glances at me for help before looking back at Jess. "...it's a swan."

"Exactly! And swans are always up to no good.”

Sounds more like Jess has got some kind of prejudice against swans then they have against us. I go to voice it but the bird suddenly changes direction. What had looked like aimless drifting becomes something altogether more deliberate as it glides towards the edge of the lake, climbs onto the grass with surprising ease and turns to face the bridge we're standing on.

Ruby's smile falters. "Josh..."

"Yeah?"

"What’s it doing?"

I keep my eyes on the swan as it waddles onto the path, giving itself a little shake before lifting its head. It's a fair distance away, close enough that I can make out the orange of its beak but far enough that I can't imagine it posing much of a threat. "Maybe this is where swans hang out?”

"On bridges?"

"I don't know." I glance at her. "Do I look like Dr. Doolittle? I’ve never spoken to a swan, funnily enough.”

Ruby’s shoulders begin to shake.

“Do not laugh out loud.” Jess warns with great levity. “He will think you’re laughing at him.”

I peer at her. “Are you Dr. Doolittle?”

Jess dreamily sighs. “I loved that film as a kid.”

“Seems like you think you’re in it.”

Jess ignores me as she just keeps staring at him, her entire body tense enough that she's forgotten to wobble for the first time all evening.

“Come on," I say, gently steering her forwards. "Let's just keep walking." But she refuses to move. "Jess..." I dejectedly sigh.

“No."

This is going beyond the realm of my capabilities. "No?" I sputter. “What do you mean no?”

“He has spotted us.”

I follow her gaze back to the swan. He's still standing exactly where he was, neck stretched high, staring in our general direction.

"Jess," I fight to not sound annoyed, "I'm fairly certain he doesn't even know we exi—" The words die in my throat. Without so much as a warning, Bernardo drops his neck until it's almost level with the ground, lets out a hiss so loud it echoes across the bridge and comes charging towards us with an alarming amount of speed.

"Jesus fucking Christ!"

"I TOLD YOU!" Jess shrieks, sounding more vindicated than frightened as she attempts to climb further up my side.

"Why's he so fast?" Ruby yelps, stumbling backwards beside me.

"Why's he hissing?"

"Why's he got wings?" Jess cries.