Page 58 of Under the Influence

I watch as she slips her shoes back on. Desperate to stop her, I speak, “He just left. He packed his stuff up and walked out. He didn’t even try to fix it, he didn’t want to.”

She stills, dropping the laces she was tying. I continue, fully aware I’ll probably regret this later, “He was gone. All. The. Time. They fought all the time, and my dad spent most of his time working in the burn unit doing plastic surgery, and my mom was sad. I could see it. We all did. She turned to the church for help but instead, she got Ethan fucking Blackwood.”

She fills the empty space next to me, “People make mistakes, Nash.”

“Yeah, that’s what she did. She made a mistake, and he couldn’t see past that. Instead, he found a new family and forgot about mine.”

"He left and my mom hit the Xannies so hard she barely knows what day it is. If it wasn’t for Carson’s parents, I wouldn’t have eaten some nights. My dad wanted me to come live with them, but I couldn’t leave her, you know? Because she needed me. She still needs me.”

She tilts her blue eyes in my direction, tears pooling behind them, “I didn’t mean to mess things up for you.”

I sigh, “I’ve spent the past two and a half years wondering what things would be like for my family if I hadn’t kissed you that day.”

“Yeah, well, while you were trying to forget, I held on to that memory for dear life. When I would need somewhere to go in my mind to get away from it all, that’s where I went. To the batting cage, with you.”

Her words nearly gut me. She thought about us? I tried for years to push the memory of her away, but truthfully, I didn’t want to forget. That day meant the same thing for both of us.

I was her safe space, and I’ve spent the past week trying to make her miserable. I’ve never had anyone depend on me for anything, and suddenly I’m feeling a little guilty for betraying her memory of the guy she thought I was.

“I found her,” she whispers, her voice cracking. “Aspen. I drove her to the hospital. I can’t even get in my car without seeing her in the passenger seat bleeding.”

Shit.

“What happened?”

She rolls her eyes, willing her tears away, “You know everything, remember?”

Maybe I don’t know everything, but I know more than I probably should. I know that there was a sex video of Aspen’s boyfriend and Corinne. I know that Aspen died the next day, and I dug into it enough to know that everyone blames Corinne for her death.

She stands up quickly, leaving that conversation behind. The blood glistens on the floor and continues dripping from my t-shirt tied around her arm.

“Shit, we gotta get back so I can take you to get that looked at,” I wince. I can’t believe I pushed her like that.

“Yeah, it looks like the rain has slowed down.” She agrees. “We should probably go.”

I smile, “Or we could take a little tour of the house just to be sure the storm is over.”

“Breaking and entering isn’t really my strong suit,” she tilts her head to the side, offering me a stern motherly look.

“That ship has sailed, don’t you think?”

She rolls her eyes, “Okay, but just a quick sweep.”

I grab her hand, leading the way. I watch her eyes skim every inch of our interconnected hands. I think she even surprises herself when she doesn’t pull away.

We explore the house, and it’s massive. I’d say four of my houses put together, and mine isn’t small. Everything is beautiful, the floors, the fixtures, the giant bathrooms. Corinne stares in awe as we bounce from room to room.

“This place is incredible.”

“I know. I think it has too many rooms, though.”

“Yeah,” she agrees. “I don’t know why anyone would need so many.”

“Maybe for crotch goblins?”

She giggles, “You’d need like fifteen or twenty kids to fill this house.”

“Yeah,” I growl. “I don’t want kids.”