Page 80 of The Doctor

What if he was silent because he was trying to tell me goodbye?

What if he left me, and I lost what was left of my sanity?

“Zee?” His name was a plea, nothing more than a prayer, my desperation begging for him not to leave me.

He shuddered against me, then turned his face until he was kissing my skin, sucking along the column of my throat, licking along my jaw, until his mouth was on my mouth, his tongue was swirling against my own, and he was rocking me against himself, making love to me again.

“Was so worried I was going to lose you,” he whispered against my lips, his grip tightening on my ass and my back. “Thought he was going to take you away. Tell me I couldn’t keep you. Tell me this love I have inside me wasn’t okay.”

“It is, Zeno. It’s more than okay.”

“It’s perfect,” he said, just a quiet grunt as he thrust his hips. “So fucking perfect. Just like you, Clara. Your goddamn pussy. Your beautiful, wonderful heart.”

“I love you.” It was just a whisper, because that was all I could manage. Every inch of me melted under his praise, even as my brain held onto all those what ifs.

What if he didn’t say it back?

What if he stopped loving me?

“Love you.” He grunted, his thrusts quickening, his hand slipping between us to press against my clit. “So much, Clara. Love you so fucking much.”

A cry left me, my body sagging in relief even as his fingers spun me up higher, twisted me tighter, twirled me toward the edge of oblivion before he shoved me right off.

Zee swallowed the next cries, his dick pulsing inside me as I fell apart in his lap.

“Love you so much, Clara. Love you so much.” He whispered it like a mantra, and I let it soak through me, filling me up until I was overflowing. Until the words quieted the raging storm inside my head.

I spit out a laugh, a quiet chuckle that shook the fragile air between us. “The look on Paulo’s face.”

Zee laughed too, edging back so he could see me. He cupped my cheek, ran his thumb across the corner of my lips. “You told Michele?”

“He already knew. I’m guessing Nadia and Mario figured it out too.”

He gave me half a smile, then pressed a chaste kiss to my lips. “We should go.”

Nodding, I kissed him back. “Okay.”

Zee helped me climb from his lap before he grabbed tissues from the center console and helped me clean up. Once we were both tucked into our clothes and sitting properly in our seats, he drove us across the city to the Davids’s house. Their housekeeper led us inside, but she didn’t need to show us to the room the family was in. Chaya’s cries filled the air and made me want to cry too.

“She hasn’t stopped,” Sarah said, even as her daughter raised her hands and tried to clamor into Zee’s arms.

I know the feeling, kiddo.

Chaya quieted a little as Zee held her against his chest, rocking her the same way he’d rocked me when I was her age.

“It’s going to be okay, kid.” He peeked up at me, and I could see the guilt in his eyes as clearly as I could feel it inside of me.

We shouldn’t have done what we did. While we were seeking out pleasure, poor Chaya was miserable.

“Can Zee take a look at you?” he asked in a gentle voice, shifting toward the couch when Chaya whimpered against his shoulder. “I’m just going to set you down so I can see.”

“No!” She tightened her grip around him, and it had my heart clenching in my chest.

I felt the same.

I’d acted the same, when I was a child.

Every moment I could, I wanted to be with Zee. To be held by him. To be with him.