Page 28 of Never Pucking Ending

There is no way he misheard his name. What the hell? “It’s Dane, silly.” My smile is forced as I turn toward Jesse, who still has Dane’s hand in his grip. They’re no longer shaking.

Dane smiles, but there’s something in his eyes that wasn’t there before. Challenge. “You play sports, right? Was it football?”

Oh, dear lord.

“Hockey, actually,” Jesse answers plainly. “I’m with the Fireflies here in Connecticut.”

Dane nods. “That’s right. I’m not much for sports to be honest, but good for you.”

Are they seriously going to hold hands the rest of the day and have a dick measuring contest? I clear my throat and clap my hands together once. “Dane owns his own contracting business and is going to build some shelves for me when I’m ready.”

Jesse finally let’s go of Dane’s hand and passes me the items he brought in. “And your mother suggested him?”

I accept the offering, smelling something sugary inside the bag that makes my stomach rumble awake. I’d had a piece of toast before I left this morning but that was it. “Yes. Our mothers still keep in touch.”

Apparently, the fun fact isn’t as interesting to Jesse as it is to me. “If you two are done going over work things, I was thinking we could go grab something to eat. I’m sure you haven’t eaten yet today.”

My mouth parts as two sets of eyes are suddenly on me. Because now I’ve been invited to dinner twice. By two different men. And they’re expecting an answer.

“I, uh…” Wetting my lips, I take a deep breath and turn to Jesse. How many times are we going to be trapped in the same cycle? Things lately have felt different between us, and they never lead anywhere. I can’t help holding onto hope that anything will change, and I’m too afraid of what will happen if they do.

Dane is new. He’s safe.

“Dane actually just asked if I wanted to grab dinner, so…” I let my words trail off, feeling instantly bad as soon as they’re out. I do want to go out with Dane. But there’s a brief moment of crestfallen emotion on Jesse’s face that I never want to see again.

“Oh,” he says.

Oh. Who knew that word could be so universal? I feel that ‘oh’ in my soul. I want to take it back. Suggest the three of us go out. But that would be a bad idea. Possibly the worst one I’ve had yet. So, I don’t mention it.

Safe, I remind myself. Dane is safe.

Rubbing my lips together, I shift on my feet and tell myself not to feel bad about this. “I’ll see you at home though. Okay?”

Dismissed.

Jesse’s jaw tics like that upsets him, but he gives me a stiff nod and sets the coffee cup down beside me. “If you need anything, text me.”

The sentence is as stiff as his shoulders, and I want to grab his arm as he heads toward the door. But I refrain. Because this needs to happen. The line we keep almost crossing has to be redrawn or we’ll never stop.

When he’s gone, my heart feels heavy.

“That was…” Dane pauses. “Something.”

I wave him off. “Jesse’s protective. That’s all.”

Dane looks at me for a second before nodding, but he doesn’t sound convinced when he replies, “Yeah. Maybe.”

*

The date with Dane may have been better if I wasn’t so in my head the entire time. We go to one of my favorite Italian restaurants, share a bottle of my favorite sweet wine, and catch up on what we’ve been up to over the past two decades since seeing each other.

It’s…fine.

Fine, but not great.

Fine, but not… Ugh. I blame Jesse for that damn face he made the second I turned him down and agreed to come here with Dane. He wasn’t even supposed to be back until early tomorrow morning anyway. Why would he get back early?

“You all right?” Dane asks, sipping his drink and leaning back in his chair. “Or did I bore you to death with all my riveting talk about rafters.”