Page 190 of In at the Deep End

“It’s going to be a bit crazy here tomorrow. Jeff and Babs are bringing half the furniture between them, Cyn’s promised to bring food, and Callum has apparently decided I need a playlist.”

It took Matt a second or two to bring himself back into the conversation.

“Sounds terrifying. I’m sorry I’ll miss it.” Matt meant the words lightly, but Owen’s expression softened.

“I’m sorry too.”

Matt shrugged. “I should’ve paid more attention to dates when I booked the train.”

“It’s probably for the best.” Owen’s tone was gentle, almost reassuring. “It’s going to be hectic, and you deserve to celebrate finishing it properly. I’m sure Eric will make a fuss.”

It was exactly the sort of thing Owen would have said before. Sensible, thoughtful, kind.

Once, those things had made Matt feel safe.

Now they seemed to put another inch of distance between them.

He gazed around the garden, taking in everything he’d spent the summer working on. Tomorrow, there would be people here. People sitting around the pool, drinking and eating, admiring the house and the garden.

He wouldn’t be one of them.

For a moment, he wondered if Owen would notice.

Then he almost laughed at himself. Of course he would notice. Owen noticed everything.

He just didn’t want Matt to be there.

The thought landed with enough force that Matt had to look away. It felt mean.

Owen was still talking about something—the weather, perhaps, or how much food Cyn had promised to bring—but Matt was barely listening. He was suddenly far too aware of the strange, almost domestic familiarity that had once made his heart lift whenever he was here.

Only now it hurt.

Owen could still make him smile without seeming to realise that he was breaking his heart.

Matt picked up his mug and carried it into the kitchen, Owen following.

“I’d better go. I’ve got an early train, remember?”

Owen nodded. “Of course.”

Matt hesitated before adding, “Thanks for the coffee.”

“You’re welcome.”

“And…” He caught sight of the envelope Owen had left on the worktop. “The final pay packet.”

Owen smiled. “You earned every penny of it.” Matt picked it up, and Owen cleared his throat. “Actually, if you find there’s more in there than you expected, that’s down to me. Call it a bonus.”

Matt looked at him. “You really didn’t have to do that.”

“I know.” Owen gestured towards the hatch that opened onto the dining room. “You’ve done so much here. Everywhere I look, I see your touch.”

The words should have made Matt happy.

They hurt.

Your touch.