Page 137 of In at the Deep End

He frowned.

“Most people spend their lives hoping they’ll meet someone who makes them feel the way Owen makes you feel.” Eric paused. “You’ve already found him.”

“And if he doesn’t love me back?”

“Then it’ll hurt.”

The honesty caught Matt off guard.

“But don’t let fear convince you this wasn’t worth feeling.”

Matt said nothing.

“Now,” Eric said in a bright tone, “finish that dissertation before you start writing Owen’s name in your bibliography.”

Matt managed a laugh. “That feels an extremely random way to end this call.”

“It was all I could think of.”

“Eric? Sweetheart? What does a man need to do around here to get some breakfast?” a voice called out in the background.

Eric laughed. “Coming.” He sighed. “No rest for the wicked.” A pause. “Are you okay? Or have I just detonated a bomb in your morning?”

“Yes, to both. But I’ll cope.” Matt said goodbye, pocketed his phone, and sat there.

The pool shimmered in the morning sunshine. A blackbird landed on the fence, cocked its head, then flew off again.

Everything appeared exactly the same, and yet it wasn’t.

He was in love with Owen.

How long have I felt like this?

Long enough that he couldn’t remember when he’d stopped looking forward to working in the garden, and started looking forward to seeing Owen. Coffee had become less about caffeine and more about sitting opposite a man whose smile made everything feel easier. Conversations with Owen had become the best part of his day.

‘I’ll see you tomorrow’ had become something he looked forward to hearing.

He laughed to himself. I am completely and utterly hopeless.

Then the laughter faded.

Love changed everything—and nothing.

Owen had never pretended this was heading anywhere. If anything, he’d been painfully clear. Ben had been the love of his life, and he wasn’t looking to repeat that.

Matt stared across to Owen’s bedroom.

I won’t become another person expecting Owen to feel something he doesn’t.

That wouldn’t be fair, not after everything Owen had trusted him with.

Not after hearing him talk about Ben.

Matt rested his elbows on his knees.

I love Owen, but that’s my problem, not his.

The thought hurt more than he’d expected.