Page 74 of Split You Open

Blair lets out the softest of scoffs. “If you didn’t like the drowning story, you wouldn’t like this one.”

Mentally, my hackles rise.

Her dad is a piece of fucking shit. Resentment burns like acid in the back of my throat. I’ll never accept the fact that Blair needed to be treated so cruelly growing up. She might not see it as abuse but her whole life was one deliberate trauma after another. While Anchor might not touch little children, I’d make the exception about throwing him into the woods to hunt down and chop up.

“Talk to me, Blair,” I plea. “You know we have a plan, right? Maybe the nightmares will stop after we talk to Ledger?”

All signs of relaxation evaporate at the sound of Ledger’s name. Blair’s body goes rigid in my arms.

“I don’t think anything Ledger says will change jack shit,” she says, her voice suddenly cold.

“You don’t know that. It could change everything. Once we get answers⁠—”

“Look, Rhett,” Blair snaps, cutting me off. “I know you guys love him and I’m coming to terms with the fact that you all will protect him no matter what—that you’ve chosen your side—but I just don’t think⁠—”

“What?”

My arms drop away from her body only so that I can grab her shoulders and twist her around to face me. Blair meets my gaze in the dark and I see it—so much raw pain that I can practically feel it myself, right down to my soul.

“This isn’t about sides. No one is picking Ledger over you, Blair.” My words come out sharper than I intend but anger rises up and I can’t control myself. “That would never happen in a million years.”

The disbelief in her eyes cuts me to the quick.

“And yet, you all want to protect him,” she says, her voice flat. “From me. Wes says to deal with the stress in my life, yet no one will actually let me do that. I’ve agreed to ‘talking’ to Ledger because I don’t want any of you to hurt but god this feels…” She shakes her head. “Pointless. How will listening to lies help me?”

“Blair, Ledger is—” My throat squeezes and for a second I can’t breathe.

So many excuses well up, all so loud and just wanting to be heard. I pick the most honest, loudest answer.

Softly I admit, “I’m fucking scared of losing someone else important to me, Blair. I have to at least hear him out before we do something permanent.”

The pain in Blair’s eyes deepens, as if my explanation only hurts her more. I hate seeing it more than I hate how out of control this whole situation has become. Reaching up, my fingers wrap gently around the front of Blair’s neck. I step closer so there’s hardly any space between us.

“If it comes down to it, it’s you, Blair. I’d pick you—no questions asked, no bars held.” I whisper the truth, not to hide it from anyone else but so that she’s forced to hear me. “I’ll always pick you.”

Her eyes widen—clearly not expecting my answer.

The surprise on her face cuts deeper than the fact that she thought we would turn our backs on her for the man locked in a cage downstairs. Why is she so taken back by my response?

Then it hits me.

I thought I knew what isolation and loneliness were. Since coming to Gnarly Pines, I’ve had a family. I pushed them away time and time again, but they’ve always been here, waiting for me to come around. Never once did they give up on me. They’ve been standing behind me, holding me up this whole time.

Blair has never had this.

There’s never been anyone in her corner, fighting for her. The father that she admires so much is a piece of shit—he doesn’t count. He seems like the type of man that would shove his daughter into a ring to teach her how to fight for herself and watch as she got her ass beat by life. And Ledger, the only other constant person in her life, sat back and watched the abuse until he realized he could commit his own atrocities against her.

Her lack of faith in me isn’t something I did—though with how shitty I’ve been toward Blair since her arrival I guess it could’ve played a small role—this is just how she’s wired.

Blair is used to facing shit alone.

To being alone.

Her ability to compromise—to let us interrogate Ledger rather than let her torture and kill him—it’s not for her benefit, it’s for ours. Blair’s willing to bend so that none of us would break. She’s ready to continue to feel alone in this as long as the rest of us are happy.

My heart shudders under the enormity of that sacrifice.

And protests against it.