Page 173 of The Incendiary

I tilted my head at him. “Are you having trouble hearing today? Or were you not paying close enough attention in your youth during lessons about our gods?”

He let out a nervous laugh, and I took a moment to marvel that Elias Winterton was now nervous because of me. Perhaps finding joy in that was petty, but I couldn’t find it in me to feel bad about it.

“Soltum.” He ran his hand through his thick and messed bronze hair. “Is that… is that how you defeated that beast so handily in the second test?”

A chill started at the base of my spine at the memory. The beast’s voice echoed between my ears, crawling down and around my neck like cold fingers.

She is searching for you.

“Aryella?” Elias’s concerned voice drew my attention back to him. I’d been staring into the fire and hadn’t realized. “Are you all right?”

My hand reached for my neck, to where the handprints often were. “Yes.” I dropped my hand, and then I lied straight to his face. “I’m fine, and I’d like to speak with Damond now.”

“Sure.” He stood immediately. Elias seemed so willing to appease me. Did he feel guilty over everything that had happened in the Barracks, or was this how he would have treated me all along had he known I was his queen?

“Thank you,” I called after him.

He gave me a curt nod. “I’ll send him in.”

After he left, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the floor-length mirror to my right and tilted my head to further expose my neck. The bruises along my jaw and cheeks were starting to yellow and fade, and the handprints were nearly gone. I wanted to conceal them, but my magic still felt weak from healing Gemma. At least whoever the cold hands belonged to hadn’t visited me since the morning after the second test. I wasn’t naive enough to believe they weren’t coming back.

While waiting, I chose a simple ivory dress and a pair of matching flats from the bottom of the wardrobe. Then, I started to pace and ramble in my thoughts. Most of all, I prayed that Damond knew something that no one else did. That Gavin was still alive somehow. I would look for him. I would⁠—

A knock on the door cut off my thoughts.

“Come in,” I called.

So much had changed since the last time I’d seen Damond, but he looked just the same. Perfectly kept brown curls, circular glasses, and a warm smile. Only now, he also looked tired. And sad.

“Hey, you,” he greeted me. He carried a large leather bag that he dropped to the floor as soon as the door closed and locked behind him.

I had planned on keeping it together, but the moment I saw Damond, all I could think about was that he was the one other person in this world who truly cared for Gavin Smyth. My heart crumpled, and my makeshift composure was gone.

“Tell me it’s not true,” I pleaded in a choked whisper, covering the distance between us. “Damond,” I cried again, a little frantically this time. “Please tell me he’s not gone.”

His warm expression descended into pity. “I’m sorry, Aryella.”

My knees gave out. He lunged forward and caught me before I could hit the ground.

“You’re all right.” He brushed his hand over my hair. “It’s going to be all right.”

I ignored him, gripped his forearms to steady myself and rushed out, “I have to look for him.”

“Ary.” Damond shook his head. “No.”

“Yes! He searched for me for four hundred years. I can’t just give up⁠—”

“He’s gone, Ary.”

“How do you know?” I demanded, shaking him by the shoulders. “Tell me how you know!”

His chest rose and fell with a controlled breath. “We had a meeting spot west of Tovick. Every month for the last ten years, on the fifteenth day of the month, we’ve met there. He’s only ever missed when Molochai gives him a command to kill. When that happens, he always found a way to send word. But he missed the last one without doing so.”

I pulled away from him. “The middle of the month, when you said you were out trading? Did you go see him during the months we were in Varamuth?”

Damond winced, affected by guilt. “Yes. I saw him.”

I thought I should be angry with him, for hiding this from me, but all I felt was sorrow. “How was he?” I asked deliriously.