Page 55 of The Fall

“That’s different.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s Max. He’s not looking for anything else.”

Kelsey’s eyebrows raise in surprise. “You’re more delusional than I thought if you think Max doesn’t want more with you. I’m pretty sure Max would marry you today if you said you wanted to.”

“No. It’s not like that.”

“It’s very much like that, Sav. That man has been in love with you since your first season together. You just refuse to see it because you don’t want to mess up the dynamic.”

Well, shit. There’s nothing like being called out first thing in the morning. Unfortunately, I refuse to admit defeat. “I think you’re wrong.”

Her eyebrows raise, and she pulls her phone out of her pocket. “Shall we call Max and ask?”

I grab her phone out of her hand. “No, we shall not.”

She laughs. “So what are you going to do about Coach Hotty McHotterson?”

“I’m not going to do anything. He made it clear that he’s my coach and he doesn’t want to distract me. Which is exactly how I feel. I don’t need distractions. I have a goal and I need to get there.”

“So you can’t have any fun while you reach your goals?”

“Not if it involves my coach. Tati would be pissed if she found out.”

“How would she find out? You told me the other day she’s hardly ever at the rink anymore. And I’m not saying you guys should go to Pound Town in the middle of the rink. You’re an adult, and you have this wonderful apartment you can bring him back to,” she says as she gestures to my room.

“Oh yeah? So my crazy little sister can walk in on us right before we finish?”

She laughs. “Put a scrunchy on the door or something so I know not to walk in. Or, another more practical idea, learn to lock your door.”

I roll my eyes. There’s no reason to lock my door because I will not be sleeping with my coach. Period.

“Did you want to get breakfast or not?” I ask, hoping we can be done with this conversation.

“Yes!” She jumps up. “But you need to put pants on.”

“Obviously. Give me fifteen minutes, please.”

She nods and walks out, and I collapse back onto my bed, replaying the events of the morning. Logan is right. We definitely crossed a line we shouldn’t have, but it felt so good. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to be around him every day and not want his hands on me again.

How have I gotten myself into such a mess?

I groan and force myself to get ready for a day with my sister.

NINETEEN

SAVANNAH

Logan has been the epitome of professionalism the last few days. There have been no dirty comments, no asking me to stay late and skate with him, no longing glances. Actually, he barely looks at me at all. I know it’s for the best, but I’d be lying if I didn’t wish he’d look at me like he’s dying inside, just like I am.

Every day, I show up to the rink. I warm up. I skate. I meet with my other coaches. I do all my required classes. I listen to everyone’s feedback. Max and I perfect our routine even more. It’s exactly what I wanted.

But all I can think about is how Logan’s lips felt on mine. How his hand felt between my legs. How I want more.

It’s so unlike me. I’ve never been one to really care about sex or anything to do with a relationship. Skating has always been my number one. Relationships require a commitment I’ve never wanted to give someone else.

Now I find myself making it a point to find Logan while I’m on the ice. It’s like I want his approval more than anything. I want all of his attention, and this hot and cold is killing me.