Page 86 of The Addendum

“I don’t have to have a presence,” I insisted.

“You do. You became a presence the moment you tossed that shirt at Richard.”

“Not my finest moment,” I admitted. “But I’m not a daily presence.”

“No,” he replied quietly. “But I think somewhere deep in your heart, you want to be one. You’re just too frightened to admit it.”

I stabbed a piece of chicken, chewing it slowly. Then I speared some asparagus and ate it. I didn’t taste either, but it stalled having to speak.

“Why would I want to involve myself with someone who never wanted me? Why set myself up for that?”

“That hasn’t been proven yet.”

“My mother—”

He held up his hand, interrupting me. “Your mother had her reasons, but you have to at least consider the fact that she fudged the truth. And you’re lying to yourself, love. If you really didn’t care or want to be involved, you wouldn’t feel guilty about Grace and Heather fighting. Or Grace and Richard being estranged.”

“Who says I feel guilty?” I challenged, tossing my hair.

He smiled. “You forget how well I know you, Ashley. I know the way you try to hide your emotions, but I see them. I see you. I know the warm, loving heart that beats in your chest. How you care for people.” He reached across the table. “It’s okay to want to get to know Heather more. To sit and talk to Richard as a person. It doesn’t lessen your love toward your mom or hurt her memory. You aren’t being disloyal.”

I gaped at him. How did he know all these hidden emotional triggers I was feeling?

He tilted his head, answering me as if I had spoken out loud. “Again, I see you, Ashley. The real you. You don’t have to hide anything from me, love. I’m not judging. I only want to help.”

I squeezed his fingers. “You always do.”

“I always will. I keep telling you—you’re stuck with me.” He slid his hand away and ate more of his dinner. “Life is too short to hold grudges. All I’m asking is that you don’t write off what was a great new friendship. The fact that you’re related to Heather is simply a bonus. You don’t have to establish a relationship with each of them immediately. You can take your time. Just don’t shut the door completely.”

Then he pressed his fork to my mouth. “And eat, please.”

I accepted the steak because, really, it was delicious. Then I picked up my fork and sliced off some chicken, chewing and swallowing. His pleasure at the sight of me eating was evident, and it surprised me how much I wanted to please him.

He finished his steak and picked up his wine again. “I perhaps have a solution to your roommate problem.”

“Already? Someone looked at the ad I sent you?”

He grinned so hard, his eyes crinkled. “Yes, they’re very excited about it.”

“Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I haven’t met them yet.”

He waved his hand. “They’re a shoo-in. Perfect for you.” He drained his wine, then added more to his glass and refilled mine. “One less thing on your plate.”

“Who is it?” I asked, curious as to why he seemed so certain.

He lifted his glass, raised it to his lips, and winked.

“Me.”

25

LUC

Once again, I shocked Ashley into silence. Our easy dinner had taken a few unexpected turns, but I was going with it.

“I beg your pardon?” she asked, incredulous. “What did you just say?”

I set down my wine and spread my arms, going for levity. “Meet your new roommate.”