Page 197 of What Change Entails

Not his heart, perhaps. She could not doubt that entirely. But his future. His obligations. The extent of what he offered and what it would cost. He had once believed her beneath him. He did not now, or said he did not, and she believed him. Yet love had its own blindness. Had she not seen that in Jane? In Bingley? In herself with Wickham, though that had not been love, thank heaven, just vanity dressed as discernment.

The thought irritated her enough to restore some balance.

Miss Bingley would be delighted if she knew Elizabeth stood here tormenting herself.

That settled the matter for the moment.

Elizabeth left the morning room and went in search of her aunt.

She found Mrs. Gardiner in her chamber, folding a letter.

“My dear,” her aunt said, taking one look at her. “What has happened?”

Elizabeth hesitated.

“She spoke to me.”

“Miss Bingley?”

“Yes.”

Mrs. Gardiner placed the letter on her desk. “Sit down.”

Elizabeth did, though she almost immediately wished to stand again. “She spoke of trade. Of society. Of what marrying Mr. Darcy might mean.”

Mrs. Gardiner frowned. “Ah.”

“It was not all nonsense.”

“No. That is what makes it crueler.”

Elizabeth looked up.

Her aunt came to sit beside her. “A lie may be dismissed. A partial truth is more troublesome.”

“I do not doubt him.”

“I did not suppose you did.”

“That is almost worse. If I doubted him, I could be angry at him. But I believe him, Aunt. I do. And still I know that believing him does not answer every question.”

Mrs. Gardiner took her hand. “No, it does not.”

“He has not formally asked me.”

“Not at this time.” Her look was knowing.

Elizabeth’s cheeks warmed despite everything. “No.”

“But you believe he will?”

The answer came without hesitation.

“Yes.”

Mrs. Gardiner squeezed her fingers. “Then speak to him when he returns.”

“I mean to.”