Page 92 of Fate In Fiction

“Not quite, darling.” Nicki laughs, shutting the door behind her, but opening a part of my heart I’ve only just been able to shut off.

“Little darlin’,” I whisper, blinking back the memories.

My eyes glance out the window up at the night sky. London has been my new home for the past three weeks, and this is the first time I’ve been able to see the stars from my window. I zone in on the brightest one. I’m the captain of my own ship, but I’ve never felt more lost. Emmett floats through my mind like a treasure I never got to keep as I search the stars for answers. The memories of us are never going to fade, but they’re also just out of reach.

I thought I had a grasp on being in control. Being on my own, finding myself. But finding yourself is ever-changing.

The bathroom light flickers on, drawing my attention to the mirror. The woman staring back at me flashes through the past two months. My vision blurs like a kaleidoscope of every night in a different outfit, accompanied by each man I’ve taken home in an attempt to replace the one I want.

With a deep breath and smile, I make my way down to the lobby with Nicki, and we head out to meet a few friends at someone’s flat. A girls’ night in. Halting the men was a smart choice. It wasn’t helping me anyway. I need to make sure that in my next relationship, the guy knows what he’s getting into right from the start to avoid this mess.

Five of us gather in the living room, sipping wine, casually talking, and scrolling through our phones. I’ve never been one to be on my phone with people around, but I’m the minority with this group. Nursing my wine, I open a social media app with my book account. Managing it abroad has been easy, and the change in my brand to the wandering reviewer has captured even more attention. I scroll to look busy as the girls on the other end of the couch go crazy and gush about something.

“Ugh, he’s literally the sweetest.” Jaimie places a hand over her heart. “We need more men aware of this shit.”

“Seriously! I keep watching these videos.” Nicki looks around, checking if the others share her enthusiasm. “All the women he is funding this month, and listening to their stories, has left me swooning and melting.”

“Gah, he’s so hot. My sister just had her surgery, and it isn’t cheap.” Gillian leans forward, turning her phone sideways as the girls gather around it.

I’m the odd one out, still slouched into the couch. Done are my days of boy talk and the drama that comes along with it. Just when I thought I had met my match, he had to go and want a family. But who can blame him? A video begins playing, and the lady rambles on as I stare at my phone, drowning her voice out.

“It’s true. Me, like many other men, have our own ignorance when it comes to a women’s menstrual cycle.” My ears awaken, picking up on the familiar voice. “What we don’t realize is that a period is more than just bleeding every month. For some women, it’s easier to get through.” Holy shit, I am manifesting or going crazy as Emmett’s heartfelt voice rings through the room. “Others have to face excruciating pain, surgery, and in some cases, it’s difficult to become pregnant or carry a child to term.” My heart pounds as I stare at the phone in Gillian’s hand, my attention fully engaged. “Take a look around; endometriosis affects one in every ten women. So many other women go undiagnosed.” He knows. He knows and isn’t just telling me. He’s telling the world.

“It touches my heart that you have put this much effort into speaking about this. I personally struggle, and my daughter had to be conceived through IVF,” the lady’s voice speaks loudly. “It’s a quite the cost, and sometimes it doesn’t work out.” I sit back, focusing on the words instead of staring at the screen.

“That is why I’ve started this campaign and have been helping people financially with their journeys. Ways to help couples on their journey to expand their families.” Oh. My God. “Many methods include hormonal drugs, IUIs, and IVF. Sometimes, women even need additional surgeries to prepare their bodies for those treatments. But my goal is to make men aware of societal pressures and the possibilities of your woman, or other women in your life, needing your support through it. That you understand her fears and what she’s going through.” I release the breath I had been holding as I hang onto every word he said.

“You sound seasoned.” The lady laughs, but it’s more endearing.

“I’m trying to be. Ignorance isn’t always bliss, and I’ve learned a lot. I need to make it known that I’m here for anyone going through this.” His voice is almost a plea. “And if it’s something my future wife and I face when it comes to children, then we will face it together as a team.” I know I gasped as all four heads turn my way.

“Josie?” Nicki scrunches her face in confusion. “You alright, yeah?”

“Did Emmett look at the camera at all during the interview?” My voice remains completely monotone as my head spins.

“At the end. Like he meant to say it directly to his future.” Kya turns the phone screen around and Emmett’s bright eyes and charming smile stare back at me. “So sweet, isn’t it?”

“Oh my gosh,” I whisper, feeling my body become dead weight as I sink into the shock. “I’m the reason he started this.”

“What you sayin’, darling?” Nicki’s thick accent cuts through the thumping of my heart through my ears.

“She’s gone mad after this hunk gave his heartfelt speech,” Gillian cuts in, elbowing Nicki. “I love that he said his wife would not be alone.”

“I have endometriosis.” My eyes cradle tears, before they stream down my cheeks. “I’m the reason he started his campaign.”

“Your American friend might be drunk, Nicki.” Alexandra, the quiet one, finally speaks, and gives me a concerned look.

“Part of the reason I left Emmett was because he mentioned wanting six kids.” They share looks, trying to believe the tipsy new girl. “The doctors said I’m lucky if I can have one.”

“Bloody hell!” Nicki looks me over and taps away vigorously at her phone. “That is you.” She turns the phone my way to the rare candid photo of Emmett and me. “My American roommate and Emmett Wheaton. Girl!”

My bottom lip pushes forward as I fight between confusion and relief. The extreme Emmett went through bring unstoppable tears to my eyes. No one has ever gone out of their way for me. The resentment I held for him not doing his research obliterates itself after seeing him, not only tend to my needs, but to fund others along the way.

“I love him so much.” In this moment, I know exactly what I need to do.

EMMETT

I’ve tried to fix things over the past month and a half. Even if Josie does move on without me, at least she knows someone is out there supporting her and others. Now, I’m turning to the open bar at the reception on a day when two people have declared their eternal love. Gag, and fuck that.