Page 90 of Deadfall

My jaw tightened, because obviously I didn’t.

“Punishment is a beating, or worse,” Angel said, something very close to worry in his eyes.

I shrugged him off. “I have to find her.”

A beating was literally the least of my worries. When it came to Emersyn, there really wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do to protect her at this point. Angel looked over my shoulder at Seven, probably in hopes that he’d receive some help dissuading me, but he wouldn’t find an alliance there.

“You’ll need the door code,” he said finally and listed off six numbers.

I jerked my head in a nod and headed for the door. Once we were in the hallway, I felt Seven’s hesitation as he fell into step next to me.

“You sure about this?” He asked.

“You’re not?” I fired back.

“Again, man, we need to play this safe—”

“Nothing about this is fucking safe,” I snarled.

“Okay, safe isn’t the best word, but you know what I mean,” Seven said in exasperation, not the least bit put off by my tone. “What happens if Mahoney catches us and we get detained in a way that stops us from helping her? Or worse, inhibits us from moving on Mahoney if, or when, he decides to use her as leverage?”

“I can’t leave her down there.”

“Then let me go,” Seven jumped in my path and forced me to stop. “Let me go—that way, only one of us is at risk.”

“No—but, you do bring up a good point,” I said. “I’ll go.”

“You’re impossible,” Seven groaned.

“I’m not putting you in that position again,” I said flatly.

As always, the memory of that desert hell was so close I could practically smell the blood and dirt where it mixed together below Seven’s feet, as he was whipped nearly to death. We’d suffered unimaginable ways on that deployment when we’d been captured and held as prisoners of war. I’d lost everyone but Seven.

Seven gave me a look. “That was not your fault.”

“Yes, it was,” I forced the words past my clenched jaw. “It was my decision that put us there—”

“But, it was those bastards that chose to whip me, Gabriel,” Seven snapped, as though that alone was the only thing I felt guilty for. Seven’s stare hardened as his patience snapped.

He stepped closer to me. “Them. Not you.”

Even after all this time, he still couldn’t change my mind about it not being my fault. When I didn’t speak, he grabbed my shirt with both fists. I could see the past mirrored in his eyes, the same way I’m sure it reflected in mine.

“I could have stopped it—I could have told them what they needed to know,” Seven’s voice wasn’t the steady, carefree tone anymore. It was laced with pain and dark violence. “But, I didn’t. We didn’t.” He stared me down. “And, I don’t know how many times I have to say this, but you shouldn’t feel guilty for that.”

I frowned. “You’re going to have to say it a lot,” I grumbled.

Seven’s lips twitched into an almost smile. “I have already said it a lot,” he said in exasperation.

He studied my face and groaned quietly in frustration when he saw the set of my jaw. I wasn’t going to change my mind. He stepped out of my way and the tension evaporated as he waved his hand.

“Go on then,” he grumbled. “Tell her I said hi.”

I left Seven and made my way out onto the grounds of the estate. The rain had stopped, but the incessant wind and dark skies hadn’t abated. As I neared the location Angel described, I saw a door set into the rocks at the top of the cliffs. I didn’t hesitate, intent on acting like I belonged there, but just as I approached to enter the code, the door burst open. Two guards emerged, a bloody body between them. One of the guards glanced up and looked relieved to see me.

“Oh good—backup,” he panted. He tossed me a syringe, followed by a set of keys. “She got him good. Careful when you go back there, I haven’t managed to sedate her yet.”

“Is he—”