Page 57 of Butch

She shrugged. “Maybe if I had already taken a shower before and there were bubbles in it. I don’t know. I’m a little weird when it comes to cleanliness and how I feel about it and what I want done.”

“Did anything happen to make you that way?” he asked.

She played with her hands. “I thought about it when we were together in high school, but it wasn’t as bad or in my head as much. It wasn’t until I was with Edmund that he made me sit in bathwater after getting extremely dirty. I had to use that water to clean myself for the next several days. I just don’t want to sit in anything that isn’t clean or wash myself with anything that isn’t fresh water.”

“I’m going to kill him if I ever see him,” Daddy growled as he stood up, pulling Rae up with him. “He doesn’t get to do that to you without any consequences. He’s going to pay for every single thing he did to you, good or bad.”

“There weren’t many good things,” she mumbled.

“Don’t tell me that,” Daddy said. “Don’t tell me that and make me want to go out and find him on my own. Because it’s taking everything in me not to have Reaper watch over you while I go out and do just that.”

Daddy wrapped a towel around her before he unplugged the tub and let all the water drain.

“I don’t know if I want to do this,” she whispered, getting nervous.

“What’s wrong, Little Fairy?” Daddy asked.

“I don’t want to have to take this off,” she whispered as she pointed to her cochlear implant.

“Have you taken it off every time you’ve showered?” He tilted his head.

I thought he said I had to.”

“That’s why your showers have been really fast?” Daddy inquired.

She looked down at her feet and nodded. She had been terrified that something was going to happen while she took a shower, so she had made them super quick, never taking her time to enjoy it.

“You don’t have to take it off,” Daddy explained. “The doctor said that since it is the latest model, the external processor is waterproof. I made sure you wouldn’t have to take it off if you didn’t want to in the shower. I wanted you to be comfortable when doing anything.”

Her mouth fell open as she looked at him.

“Did you not hear him say that?” Daddy asked. “I guess that day was really busy and full on. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I wish you had also come to me to ask and not made yourself uncomfortable. But don’t worry, Daddy is going to do better.”

“It’s not your fault,” she replied. “It’s mine, and only mine. I didn’t want to ask and hear that I wouldn’t be able to wear it, so I just took it off. I also zoned out any information he gave that, and I have been too lazy to ask you about it.”

She wanted to know what the doctor had said she could or couldn’t do, but every time she thought about it, she got super overwhelmed and chickened out.

“It’s okay, Little Fairy. I bet you were feeling really overwhelmed about it as well, right?” he asked, and she nodded. “How about this, Daddy is going to tell you something every single day, so you learn something new. And if you have any questions, let me know,” Daddy said. “Does that sound okay?”

“Okay,” she whispered.

Daddy kissed the top of her head. “Such a good girl for Daddy. Now, let’s take a shower and get you all washed up.”

He helped her into the shower, Rae sighing in relief when the hot water hit her skin. Oh, this was glorious.

“Do you want Daddy to wash you?” he asked. “Or do you want to do it?”

“Can I wash you, too?” Raelynn asked, stepping on her tippy-toes to look at him.

“Are you sure you want to do that?”

She quickly nodded. “Yes, I do.”

She wanted to set the tone so it might lead to something else.

“Okay, you can clean Daddy, but not before we get you cleaned up. So, do you want to answer my question now?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I guess you can clean me,” she said, looking away from him.