Page 85 of For I Have Sinned

“Whether she likes it or not.”

“Is that what I am getting? A friendship?” I take a step towards her.

“Among other things.” She shrugs. “We are alone now.”

“We are.”

“Will you be punishing me now?” There is a shine to her eyes as she asks the question.

“As much as I want to, that is not the reason I tracked you down.” I stand in front of her, reaching to mess with the fabric of her dress. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“You changed your mind, didn’t you?” She shrinks back into herself, the light dimming from her eyes.

“No, I didn’t change my mind, but I’m going to visit my mom,” I reassure her.

“Oh, that’s good, Alex!” My cheeks flush at the sound of my name falling from her lips.

“I talk to her on the phone from time to time, but it’s been a while since I’ve seen her.” I rub the back of my neck. “Kind of feeling guilty.”

“I’m sure she understands the commitment you’ve made and why you can’t come home all the time.”

The commitment I made. The same one I broke for Celine.

“Yeah. She doesn’t even know I’m coming. I want it to be a surprise.”

Celine pokes at my chest. “Son of the year.”

I smile and catch her wrist in my hand, and let my lips meet the tip of her finger. “Are you going to stay out of trouble while I’m gone?”

Her mouth twists as her head bobs back and forth while thinking of her answer. “How long will you be gone?”

“I’m leaving tomorrow morning and will be back on Tuesday.”

“I could definitely find something to get into,” she teases.

“Celine,” I warn, dropping her hand from mine.

“I’m just kidding! I don’t plan on doing anything bad.” She breathes out a frustrated sigh. “Especially since I want to get out of this place.”

The question is on the tip of my tongue: what happens when you leave here?

But I don’t ask it because what is happening between us probably isn’t serious to her. Plus, I’m already freaking out as it is with the doubts of priesthood running wild in my head; I don’t want to cause her to pull away from me.

“Father Keaton will probably have someone else keep their eyes on you while I’m away.”

“Does he still think I am going to make a run for it?”

“Who knows?” I lift my shoulders. “In the beginning, he asked me to keep an eye on you in case you ran, and he hasn’t asked me to back off.”

“I never minded you watching me,” she says with a subtle amusement, but then it fades. “I was never going to run, by the way. Sure, I thought about it, but if I did, then what? My parents would be even more pissed at me. They’d track me down and probably throw me back in here. What would the point have been?”

I sit on this for a minute before I remember something she told me a while ago. “You don’t want to be here because you were tricked into coming.”

“Yup.” She pops the P. “I thought we were coming here as a family to scope out a new church. Then your lovely boss made me sign something, which I thought was to become a member of this church. Turns out I was signing my life away to the convent.”

Lifting my hand, I brush a piece of hair from her face. “I didn’t know that.”

“It’s not a big deal. It happened, and now I’m stuck with it. I pretended to make progress during my visitation with my parents today, and they believed me. Maybe I will get out of here soon.”