Page 4 of For I Have Sinned

His dark brown hair is longer, with pieces falling onto his forehead. The light above us reflects off his dark strands, making them shine. His hair is beautiful, but when I bring my eyes down to look into his own, I inhale a sharp breath. They are a beautiful amber, but appear like gold. They are warm, inviting, and unique—more than my own. Mine are a very light green, appearing almost gray in certain lighting.

Father Alexander offers me a smile that makes my body feel as though it were melting. The man is attractive. Maybe the most beautiful man I have ever seen in my life.

“How have you enjoyed your tour so far?” Father Keaton asks me, which causes my eyes to drag away from Father Alexander.

“The chapel is beautiful,” I respond truthfully.

“We put a lot of work into it. I am glad that hard work paid off and you appreciate its beauty.” He beams with pride.

I half-smile, my eyes moving to the man beside him, who still has his eyes on me but is no longer smiling.

“Have you seen the courtyard yet?” Father Keaton asks. “There are numerous plants and flowers that the Sisters tend to. I think you will find it just as beautiful as the chapel.”

“We were just about to head that way.” The woman beside me announces. “Then we were going to stop by your office, if you are not busy.”

“By all means, stop by! Father Alexander and I have notes to go over, but we will be in there when you are ready.”

They say their goodbyes and leave us in the hall to explore the courtyard. Father Keaton wasn’t lying; it is beautiful and overgrown with plants and flowers, but in a good way.

We sadly don’t stay out here too long before we end up back inside. My parents don’t want to waste any more time exploring, so we head to Father Keaton’s office. When we enter, he dismisses Father Alexander and the two nuns.

My parents take their seats in the chairs before Father Keaton’s desk, and I awkwardly stand there.

“Celine, I have a chair in the corner if you’d like to pull it up.” I take him up on his offer since these heels are killing me. I drag the chair and place it next to my mother. Once I’m sitting, he begins speaking. “I hear you would like to join the church. To experience all we have to offer.”

My mother nods. “Yes.”

“And you, Mr. Monroe?”

“Yes.”

Father Keaton slides his gaze to me, and for some reason, my heart starts to race.

“Celine, would you like to join this church?”

Shit. What do I say? No, thanks, I’d rather not have to come here and listen to you spew bullshit.

Of course, I can’t say that. So to make my parents happy and hopefully get them off my back, I say, “Yes.”

“Perfect!” he chirps, opening a drawer on the side of his desk. “I just need some signatures; it’s our standard procedure for all new guests.”

I nod again and take the clipboard he hands me. Did we have to do this at the church my parents go to? My eyes strain as I stare down at the tiny words printed on the paper. “What does this all say?”

“It is an agreement that when you are in the convent, you respect our rules and bring no damage to our building,” he explains. “We have had a lot of people come in here just to vandalize the place. Hence why we redid the chapel.” Twisting my lips, I drop my eyes back down to the paper and sign my name without reading the fine print. Handing it back to him, he takes it with a smile. “Mr. and Mrs. Monroe, you wanted to discuss a… donation?”

“Yes,” my mother says. “Celine, sweetie, why don’t you wait outside for us in the hall? I don’t want to bore you with all this talk.”

Almost immediately, I stand from my chair and leave the office. I take a deep breath in and exhale out while I head back to the lobby.

I step outside and lean against the stone building. Closing my eyes, I let the sun beat down on my face and let my mind run wild with the way I’m going to tell my parents that this is it. This was the last time I showed up at a church for them. I can’t do it anymore.

Throughout my entire life, I’ve had to deal with it, and even though the past few years have been great, I still found myself going to church with them on some Sundays. I would have told them no a long time ago, but my mother really knows how to lay on the guilt.

No more.

I need to worry about my own sanity, rather than my mother’s. It’s time to finally take a stand. Let’s hope it doesn’t blow up in my face.

Chapter 2