Page 34 of Unstable

The sun was just breaking over the horizon as he stepped into the backyard. He shot a glance toward the sliding doors where Irina hopefully still snoozed away in bed and drew in a lungful of the salty ocean air. After being with her almost every minute of the past twenty-four hours, he needed some time to himself to get his head on straight.

Irina was a walking wet dream, and it felt like his insides were literally twisted up in knots over the woman. His pulse kicked up and blood pumped furiously through his veins at the thought of her in that sexy swimsuit. He dropped his head back on a soft groan.

The only way he could think to solve the problem was to exhaust his body so completely that he couldn’t even get turned on by her. He had serious doubts it would work, but he had to try something. Because touching her was not an option. If he ever laid a hand on her, he knew it would be over.

Staying as quiet as humanly possible, he warmed up then moved into some of his Krav Maga workout. He preferred to work with a partner to sharpen his skills and reaction time, but the movement felt good, and time slipped away as the sun rose higher in the sky. He was breathing heavily by the time Irina stepped onto the patio in a sports bra and another pair of tiny shorts.

Despite his fatigue, he felt his body react at the sight of those lean legs. So much for hoping his body would be too tired to react to her. He clenched his teeth as she practically skipped over to him, her perfect white smile lighting her face.

“What are you doing?”

Trying to kill himself so he’ll stop getting so worked up over you. He cleared his throat. “Working out.”

“Well, yeah.” She rolled her eyes. “I know that. But I mean”—she wiggled her fingers in his direction—“what kind of moves are those? Is that some type of karate?”

“Krav Maga,” he corrected.

“Krav Maga.” She tested the words on her tongue, then bounced on her toes, her eyes shining with interest. “Can you teach me?”

He froze. “What?”

“You know.” She made the hand gesture again. “The self-defense stuff.”

“Um…” He couldn’t deny that it would actually be a good idea for her to learn, but self-defense was up-close-and-personal. His hands would be all over her, every inch, and he broke into a sweat just thinking about it. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

His mind spun to come up with an excuse. “Beginners normally start on the mats. The grass can get slick, and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

It sounded feeble to his ears, and they burned as she stared incredulously at him, like she wasn’t buying the crap he was selling. Neither was he.

She pursed her lips. “Well, it’s not like some stranger is going to wait until I’m in some soft, padded area to attack me.”

And there it was, the logic he so desperately despised. He grunted. “You don’t need to learn.”

“What if I need to protect myself?”

“You won’t,” he snapped. “I’m here to take care of that.”

“You won’t be around forever,” she pointed out.

Score one for the blonde. And why did hearing those words hurt so bad? A dull ache thudded through his chest, infuriating him further. “I’m here now.”

“So?” She threw her hands in the air. “What about when you’re gone?”

“Just leave it alone, Irina.”

“I don’t understand⁠—”

“Enough!” He barked out. “I’m not teaching you, and that’s final.”

“What is wrong with you?” Tears shimmered in her eyes as she glared up at him. “You’re such a jerk.”

She spun on a heel and stormed into the house, and the sliding door slammed in her wake. She was right. He was a complete jerk. All she’d done was ask that he teach her some moves to defend herself, which wasn’t an unreasonable request at all. But the thought of running his hands all over her body knowing he would never be able to have her… It was too much.

He was pissed at himself for overreacting and hurting her feelings again, but he didn’t know how to fix it. He’d either push her away or cross the line and do something he couldn’t take back. Because he knew he didn’t have the self-control to have her in his arms without wanting to kiss her and so much more.

Now he’d ruined the tenuous balance between them because he couldn’t set his attraction for her aside to do the right thing.