Page 21 of To Follow her Heart

“Oh, no,” Matilda said, shaking her head. “No, no. There’s no way I’m getting in the middle of a situation like that.”

“No,” Lady Clair said, the word spoken on a sigh of resignation. “I’m sure you’re right. Well, never mind,” she said, brisk all at once. “The problem most pressing is Mr Baxter and Miss Connolly. I can’t help but think the two need a little time alone to… to see if they cannot decide on a way forward, whatever that might be.”

“I agree,” Matilda said, relieved to change the subject. St Clair was gorgeous and eligible but there was nothing between them other than friendship. In any case, it was out of the question when his heart was set on another woman. She returned her attention to the problem at hand.

“From what Harriet told me, Mr Derby is nothing but a bully,” she said. “And it’s impossible to think straight when there is such a dominant force in the room. At the very least, Mr Baxter should have time to explain his actions to Kitty, and to either change his mind or say goodbye. Then, even if it were not what she wanted to hear, she might come to terms with it.”

Lady St Clair looked at her with approval. “You are a wise young woman,” she said, giving Matilda such a penetrating look that she blushed. “The question is, how is such a thing to be achieved?”

“Well,” Matilda said, smiling a little. “I do have an idea.”

Chapter 6

Dearest Matilda,

I do hope that you and the other peculiar ladies are enjoying St Clair’s house party. I should probably say that I wish I was there too, except it would be a dreadful lie! I miss you, of course, all of you, but life is too utterly blissful. Silas is such a darling and he and Dharani squabble constantly, like a couple of bad tempered cats. She’s in heaven. Do write and tell me about everything you are doing, though, I don’t want to miss a thing!

―Excerpt of a letter from Lady Aashini Cavendish to Miss Matilda Hunt.

21st August 1814, Holbrooke House, Sussex.

Luke made his way to the breakfast room with some trepidation. He wondered how many of the guests knew of the altercation last night, and if he would have to face Kitty and make polite conversation. He almost laughed then. Kitty ignoring the situation and making polite conversation was too farfetched. She’d never manage it. She couldn’t dissemble to save her life. Her emotions were always raw and exposed in those flashing dark eyes, eyes that had spoken to his soul from the first moment he’d looked into them.

He allowed himself to remember, as he’d not allowed himself for many years. He remembered the years he’d spent with her as his only and best companion. They’d been inseparable. His mother had been a disinterested parent, caring little for her son’s whereabouts unless it affected her own comfort. The few servants they kept were ill-paid and badly managed, and so he had unprecedented freedom.

Kitty’s parents were lackadaisical too, though not from a lack of feeling. Her father was up to his neck in turning the family’s fortunes around, totally focused on the building and running of his new mill. Kitty’s mother was often away, spending months at a time with her younger sister, who had given birth to twins barely a year after having her second child and was on the verge of a nervous collapse. Kitty, who was a sunny and robust child, was judged well able to stand her absence.

She stood it very well indeed, spending every second of every day with Luke. In the summer they even spent nights together, though with hindsight Luke knew it had been an outrageous thing to do. He’d not known that then, though, and had been too young to consider anything approaching impropriety.

His throat closed as he remembered nights toasting bread at campfires and hours staring at the stars, making impossible plans for a future that had seemed full of hope and wonder. He remembered Kitty’s slight frame hugging him close as she slept, her dark curls tickling his neck. Luke paused and took a shaky breath. If only he’d known then how special those times were, how magical… except he had known. He’d known from the start and he knew it still, and that was what made it so bloody unbearable.

To his relief, the breakfast room was quiet. His cousin Sybil was there, and a beautiful blonde woman whom he didn’t know. Sybil introduced them at once, and the woman greeted him so warmly it was clear she couldn’t know about last night’s drama.

“Luke, this is Miss Matilda Hunt. Miss Hunt, my cousin, Mr Luke Baxter.”

“Good morning, Mr Baxter, I am very pleased to meet you.”

Luke did his best to appear delighted by the introduction and sat down, realising at once that he couldn’t stomach a bite of food. He poured himself a coffee, more for something to do than with any intention of drinking it. His guts felt tied in a knot.

He’d barely sat down when another lady entered. Her age and the remarkable resemblance to her handsome son marked her out as Lady St Clair.

“Ah, Mr Baxter,” she said, giving him a welcoming smile before sitting at the head of the table. “I was sorry to hear about the problems with your carriage. We missed you at dinner. Still, there is plenty of time now you are here.”

Luke managed some kind of polite reply, though he couldn’t have said what it was the minute he’d stopped speaking. It seemed to please Lady St Clair, though, and he relaxed a fraction, hoping they’d breakfast in peace now. A look passed between Lady St Clair and Miss Hunt then, and Luke got the distinct impression they’d been plotting something.

Nonsense, he told himself. Even if they had, it would be nothing to do with him. They didn’t know him from Adam.

He allowed his thoughts to wander, returning inevitably to Kitty, and to how she’d looked in the moment she’d flung back the curtain. There had been such joy in her eyes. His heart clenched.

“Mr Baxter?”

Luke jolted, torn from his thoughts so fast he almost spilt his coffee.

“My lord,” he said, coming to his feet at once. “Forgive me, I was wool gathering.”

“Quite understandable,” Lord St Clair replied with a rather taut smile. “I wonder if you might spare me a moment of your time?”

“Of course,” Luke said at once, though he had a sinking feeling that he and his companions were about to be ejected—very politely—from the premises. “A pleasure.”