Page 38 of Time To Learn

Kristian’s words from earlier today flash into my head, and I scrunch my nose, annoyed with myself. The arrogance of his dare fires up my temper again. I don’t understand why I seem unable to forget him—why I’m letting him get under my skin—and have thought about him every five minutes since he left withLise.

But who’s counting?

“Go to hell,” I mutter.

“Who’re you talking to, Mummy?”

Startled, I jump as I turn around on the spot. Ailith is standing in the doorway, frowning atme.

I put a hand on my wildly beating heart.

“Oh, my gosh, sweetie, please don’t creep up on me likethat.”

“I wasn’t. I knocked before I came in.” She wraps her arms around her waist. She’s already in her nightgown, shivering a little. The warm summer nights are almost overnow.

I walk closer and stopping in front of her, I give her an apologetic smile.

“I’m sorry, I must have been lost in my thoughts.”

“So, who were you talking about?”

Shaking my head, I hold my hand out to her and lead her out of theroom.

“No one,” I murmur as we take the stairs down. “Absolutely noone.”

* * *

From Laura’s Journal

Flirting with a man was something I excelled at once. I was a pro at ensnaring a man, keeping him for a while, and then tossing him away once I was done with him. The cat and mouse game was fun—letting a man think that he had worn me down was almost the best part—allowing him to believe that he was this big hot shot while it was my plan all along was empowering. I enjoyed it, too, and perhaps that was the reason for my downfall. I was too focussed on the game—the chase—that I became blinded by my own arrogance.

Such afool.

Pride goes before the fall, as theysay.

And boy, did Ifall.

One day, I found myself on cloud frigging nine, soaring high in the sky. Invincible. Undefeated.

The next, I plummeted to the ground, shocked to my very core. Beaten. Overpowered.

Shivering in my cage, cowering like a dog whose heart and soul had been bruised by its master, I did not believe in a wayout.

Except…I found my way at last. And I had Ailith with me—that was all that mattered in the end. It stillis.

And now, when I think back on the three encounters I have had with Kristian, I remind myself of the past. I force myself to remember that letting down my guard—becoming consumed with lust or attraction or whatever the hell it is—will only bring me down a secondtime.

That is unacceptable.

I cannot let down my guard, not for a second. I just have to keep reminding my libido of that, and then life will go on as before.

It has to be likethis.

It just hasto.

* * *

I wakeup in the middle of the night, my heart pounding in myears.