Page 60 of One Last Thing Before You Go

“Well, so I was thinking…” She exhales and takes a step closer. The palm of her right hand comes over my chest to rest just above my heart. I’m sure by now she can feel how hard it beats against my ribs, the way her mere presence affects me—especially when she’s looking like this. It’s warm and comforting and makes me want to melt against her. Her touch, inviting as it is, seems more like a surrender, an admission, rather than an intentionally seductive act.

She swallows once, her eyes on her hand, my chest. “I was thinking,” she continues, “while I was out… I was thinking that I really like you.” Her fingers curl, lightly fisting my shirt in her hands. “And I guess I just thought you should know. Just thought I would be honest and stop trying to hide it. I want to—” She pauses. “I was thinking maybe we could give this a shot. Us. Go slow. Keep it casual. But… But give it a shot.”

There’s a ringing in my ears as I process everything she says, half of me not trusting it. Am I still dreaming? Is this all a sick dream my subconscious decided to throw at me? A car alarm blaring outside and the cold gust of air coming from my open window, raising goosebumps on my skin alerts me to the fact that I’m not.

This isn’t a dream; I’m awake. And she’s here, looking better than I ever imagined she could. But this all seems too good to be true.

“Are you drunk?” I blurt out. I knew from our earlier conversation today that she had plans to go out tonight. And by the looks of her outfit, it definitely wasn’t anywhere in town.

Where did they go? Did they meet up with some guys? Was she with anyone earlier?

God, the thought alone makes me nauseous.

“What?” Her eyes widen as she physically recoils.

“I’m sorry, but I have to ask. You went out with your friends at a girls’ night to a nightclub⁠—”

“Lounge. And I’d barely call it that,” she corrects me.

“Whatever. You were just out with your friends, drinking, and now you show up at my doorstep in the middle of the night looking like pure sin and telling me you want to stop denying that you like me? Are you gonna regret this tomorrow? Because I don’t wanna go through the same thing I did the first night we met. Unlike you, I can very openly admit that I like you and want something to happen here.” I point back and forth between us. “I don’t wanna end up feeling like I was a mistake all over again.” I do my best to not let the pain her abandonment caused bleed into my voice, but I’m not sure I do such a great job.

Dammit.

“I made you feel like you were a mistake?” she whispers, frowning, eyes filled with regret. She shakes her head, as if disappointed in herself. “I have never felt that way about you. Did I feel like it was…” She winces, struggling to find the right words. “Inconvenient given the situation? Yes. But you—you were never a mistake to me.”

“I don’t know that ‘inconvenient’ sounds any better, here,” I grumble.

She closes her eyes and blows a puff of air through her lips. “I just mean that it sucked that we were thrown into this situation because I hated walking away from you that first night. And when you first walked into the store, I was both terrified and ecstatic to see you again. But then when we found out we were inheriting the business together, that we had to work side by side… I knew it was wrong to pursue anything. So the whole thing was, yeah, inconvenient.”

I nod, hands on my hips. “So, if all the same facts remain as before, what’s changed that I don’t know about? Why are you here at one A.M. in my apartment telling me you want to give it a shot?” I have to ask, because I can’t take her flip-flopping us one more time.

She shrugs. “I feel like I deserve to go after what I want. And I feel like, if we set boundaries⁠—”

“More boundaries?”

She smiles. “Different boundaries. If we set different types of boundaries, maybe we can enjoy each other’s company in a different way.”

I narrow my eyes at her. “What kind of way?”

“C’mon, Knox.” She looks away, blushing. Still, she takes a step closer toward me, both hands on my chest, now. “You know what I mean.”

I fist my hands at my sides, fighting the urge to put them on her hips, her waist, every inch of her smooth and soft body. Because I am not touching her until I know exactly what she means.

“Lottie. You need to tell me what you want.” My breathing is ragged—embarrassing. I’m a horse gearing up for a race, the tension building as a gate holds me back from the finish line: her.

“I want you, Knox. I want you.”

CHAPTER TWENTY

KNOX

Iswallow and shake my head, certain I’m dreaming now. “What?” I’ve been waiting so long to hear those words come from her mouth.

“But—” Ah, here comes the catch. “But I can’t handle anything serious with you. I care about you, and I want us to—to hang out, see each other. But you’re leaving after we sell the bookstore, going back to your old life, and I sure as hell am gone as soon as the check clears. And… There are just things that I’ll never be able to—” She stops and takes a deep breath, her expression switching to a more serious one. “I just think we really like each other and are both adults and should be able to have a casual relationship while you’re still here.”

“And by casual relationship you mean…?”

“A sexual one, yes.” She clears her throat while I choke on my own spit. “And dates, I guess.”