Page 83 of Between Two Kings

Without warning, he leaned forward. Tem tried not to flinch, but by the look on Leo’s face, she must have. He halted, his body still angled toward hers.

“I would do anything you asked, Tem,” he whispered. “Whether I am bound to you or not.”

Tears filled her eyes. Of course she knew that—of course she understood Leo’s love for her and how he expressed it. She always had.

The only sound was the crackling of the fire. Tem wanted to lean forward too, to close the distance between them, but to do so would mean risking the tentative peace they had just found, and nothing could make her do that. Instead she said, “We can’t do this.”

“Do what?”

“Meet like this—alone. We should have…a chaperone or something.”

Leo let out a dull laugh. “A fucking chaperone isn’t going to stop me from wanting you, Tem.”

It wasn’t going to stop Tem from wanting him either. She had always thought that the pain she felt from letting Leo go was her punishment, that she deserved it. But now she realized she was not the only one being punished. Her selfless act had backfired, and Leo was hurting too. Her attempt to make things right had gone wrong. She had tried to fix something that wasn’t even broken, and now they were both paying the price.

“Then what do we do?” she whispered. “How do we control this?”

He shook his head. “I don’t think we can.”

“We have to, Leo. We have to.”

“Maybe I don’t want to.”

“That’s not an option.”

He didn’t reply. It was answer enough.

“If we could just talk it through, then maybe we could figure out—”

“I can’t,” he cried. “I can’t just talk to you. Talking is the last fucking thing I want to do with you, Tem.”

Tem bit back tears. She knew he was right; they shouldn’t even be talking as they were now. Technically, nothing had happened yet. But if they continued to do this, it would.

A memory flashed suddenly through Tem’s mind: words scrawled in spiky red ink.

“You could write to me,” she said without thinking.

Leo blinked. “What?”

Tem leaned forward, ignoring the flash of desire in his eyes. “Everything you want to tell me but can’t—you could write it instead.”

He shook his head. “What good will that possibly do?”

“I don’t know. It might help…get it out of your system.”

Leo let out a harsh laugh. Tem knew how he felt because she felt the same: there was no getting each other out of their systems. But they had to do something.

“We have to get through this somehow, Leo,” she pleaded. “For everyone’s sake.”

The problem was so much bigger than the two of them. It wasn’t just their marriages at risk. It was their kingdoms.

Leo turned from her, staring into the fire. “Fine,” he said eventually, his voice tight. “I’ll write to you.”

Dull relief pulsed through her. It was hardly a permanent solution. Or even a rational one. But if Leo could express himself in a way that didn’t harm either of them, perhaps they would be able to muddle through the rest of these dinners without ruining absolutely everything.

Leo dropped his voice. “Will you read them?”

“If you want me to,” she whispered. “Someday. But for now, just…”