Page 13 of Delirium 2

“Hell yeah. Just saw the nigga leave about an hour ago, too. Face was screwed. Looked like he had fresh scratches on it too. He was pissed. Didn’t say shit to niggas when they spoke.”

I drew back with a frown. “You spoke to Sean?”

He laughed. “Fuck I look like? That nigga Darren spoke to Sean. You know I don’t fuck with that ham ass nigga.”

Nobody fucked with Sean. Not for real. He was the true definition of a bitch ass nigga. Everybody in The Woods knew he beat on Sabrina and sometimes put hands on the kids too. He wasn’t shit. Most hated around this bitch for real. I was surprised he hadn’t been murked yet, niggas hated him so damn much.

“They got water leaking in my bathroom. I’m about to go up there and see what’s going on.”

“You didn’t call Marv?” Hood asked, wearing his signature smirk.

“Call Marv for what? His fat ass ain’t gone come over here to fix anything.”

Marvin was our building manager and maintenance man. He didn’t manage or maintain shit but always wanted rent on the first of the month. I couldn’t stand his old, fat ass. He got on everybody’s nerves too. The handful of times he did come down to The Woods, he was chased to his car by gangs of niggas, ready to beat his ass over the way things were out here. The fields hadn’t been mowed. Trash was barely maintained. It was a mess but because we didn’t have anywhere else to go, we stayed, dealing with it. The rent at The Woods was the cheapest on the east side of Brickhaven unfortunately.

Hood laughed. “Nah, facts.” He brushed his hand down the back of his neck. “You been aight tho’? Ain’t see you at Coney yesterday. They talm’bout you quit.”

I did quit.

After Exodus gave me the rundown about everything, I got on the phone with Moe and told him I wouldn’t be returning. He was pissed. Rightfully so. Coney was understaffed and I was the best cashier he had. People looked forward to seeing me at the window when they came in. Not only was I loved by the customers, I was loved by the staff too. They often talked about how the energy of the restaurant shifted every time I clocked in. That felt good. But, I had to do what was best for me and my pockets. The tips were nice, but Coney wasn’t paying me nearly enough to truly maintain on my own. That’s with how cheap rent was.

“I’ve been good. Yeah…” I paused. “I got a new job.”

“Straight up? Where at?”

I looked away from him for a moment, adjusting the strap on my bag. Exodus didn’t say my job was confidential. He didn’t say I couldn’t tell anybody. I hadn’t signed an NDA or anything like that. But I wasn’t comfortable telling Hood I worked for the Christ family, taking care of First Lady. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust him. I just didn't want everybody in my business, knowing what I had going on.

“As a home health aide.” Quickly changing the subject, I said, “Let me go up here. I gotta leave for work in a little bit.”

We said our goodbyes and I walked down the hall, heading to the staircase to take the flight of stairs up. As usual, I passed by a couple of crackheads and bad ass kids on the way there. When I got to the fifth floor, I shook my head at how stained the carpet was. There was a long black streak down the length of the hallway like someone had dragged the dirtiest piece of furniture across it multiple times. It was from the heavy foot traffic though.

I walked down the hall, bopping my head to a Drake track spilling into the hallway from one of the apartments I passed by.

“I’m upset! Fifty thousand on my head is disrespect,” I recited, dancing my way down the hallway.

Today I woke up in a decent mood. I had a much-needed conversation with God and my ancestors when I woke up. It was still very crazy to me how Meech was an ancestor now. I hadn’t spoken to him for real yet. The only thing I’d done since he died was fuss at him. I was pissed. Couldn’t believe he’d left me out here by myself. Couldn’t believe he hadn’t listened. Felt like his head wasn’t on a swivel. Felt like he hadn’t paid attention to his intuition at all on that mission. Felt like if he had, he would have come out of that alive. I knew I was thinking irrational. I knew better. Life was written. What happened would’ve happened regardless. It was his time. Still… regardless of what I knew deep down inside, I still hated it. Was madder at his soul than anything. Like… bitch… you knew we would be together and you still decided to leave me? I couldn’t leave first? I thought it was very, very selfish.

I stood at Sabrina’s door and knocked on it. After a couple of seconds, her youngest son answered. Three years old, hair matted, sagging diaper hanging off his ass. Yes. A diaper. At three years old. I tried not to judge but come on now. Sabrina knew better. She had five kids and was expecting another one. I hoped like hell it would be her last. I didn’t see how she was surviving with all of those kids in a two-bedroom apartment. It was insane.

“Hey Man-Man. Where your momma?” I asked.

“In the bathroom,” he mumbled, licking snot from his top lip, looking up at me with sad brown eyes.

I looked through the apartment, taking in the clutter and the other kids running around. The little ones were all a year apart but her oldest was ten and was rarely ever at the apartment. He roamed The Woods with all of the other bad ass kids in the community, vaping and smoking weed like a grown ass man.

“Can you tell her I’m out here? Water is leaking down into my⁠—”

“Hey Sereia!” Yelled the six-year-old, LaLa, barging to the door, wrapping her arms around me. Her hair, much like Man-Man's, was matted and all over her head. She was a pretty little girl too. Bright-eyed with a big deep dimpled smile and pretty cocoa brown skin. Every time I saw her she was so bubbly. All of Sabrina’s kids were cuties. She just did a piss poor job taking care of them. I felt so bad for them.

Despite her stained clothes, I embraced her. “Hey boo. Can you go get your momma?”

“She takin’ a bath. You can come in,” LaLa yelled before grabbing my hand, dragging me into the dirty apartment.

If Sabrina knew the kids had me in her shit, she would flip. We’d been neighbors for years and I’d never seen the inside of her spot. Stepping in, I could see why.

Not only were there clothes, shoes, toys and food all over the place. There were dirty diapers balled up, tossed around too. The walls were dirty, covered with scribbles, handprints, spaghetti sauce and only God knows what else. There were trash bags cluttering the kitchen, spilling out into the living room too. They were literally living in filth. What the hell did Sabrina do all day? She didn’t work. She collected welfare like ninety percent of the mothers in The Woods. There was literally no excuse for this.

“Look at what I made,” LaLa yelled, grabbing my hand, dragging me to the back of the apartment where the bedrooms sat.