Page 73 of Knot Broken

“No,” I said and at that word, the fur shrank back and my chipped nail polish reappeared so fast, it was like a blur. “I’m fine.”

Those two words had my guts twisting because I said them, Mum said them, all the damn time growing up. Whatever the hell was moving inside me pushed back for just a moment, a sharp twinge in my side there and gone again.

“Or I’m not really.” That had me smiling again. “But hopefully I will be. Mum and Dad, they had a dysfunctional relationship. Still do. Seeing them still orbit each other, spending their lives together, but never really connecting.” I met Kayla’s gaze head on. “That’s what got me seeing my therapist. Sometimes I stay quiet about things I really shouldn’t.” It wasn’t hard to see Grant, all of my exes, in my head, which only had that restless feeling increasing. “And other times I speak up way too much about things that don’t matter.”

“But they mattered at the time,” she said. “And everyone struggles with communication. Overreacting.” That word stung. “Underreacting. We’re all human, struggling to deal with the weight of our own responses and those around us, so we’re never going to get it right all the time.”

“Of course.” My response was glib, and that had my cheeks flushing. “I mean I know intellectually that’s the case, but it’s different in reality. It feels like I’m doomed to either suffer in silence or hit some poor unsuspecting barista with a litany of all my woes when they just want to know what kind of coffee I want.” For just a second, I sat with that feeling, but my eyes found the clock on the wall moments later. “But I think we’re out of time for today.”

“That’s usually my line,” Kayla said with a smile. “Look, I’ve been instructed to touch base with you every couple of days in the first week, just to make sure everything’s OK. If it’d help, I can bring some things in to discuss.” She watched me stiffen. “Nothing to do with parents or oversharing or anything. If it’s useful, we can talk more about it. If it’s not, then at least it won’t be sitting here in silence.”

“Right, OK, sure, that sounds fine,” I said, but when I got to my feet, my thigh muscles flexed, throwing me off my balance, forcing me to recover quickly. “See you then.”

What would she bring to the session? I thought as I walked back to the suite. We’d had one conversation… no, more like half of one and she was already thinking there was something to discuss? Was it so apparent there was something wrong with me that she clocked it within minutes? I didn’t have any answers, not when I reached the suite, nor when I walked in through the door.

“Hey.” Tex was up and over the back of the couch and striding towards me. Grey looked up from where he was making coffee, setting the kettle down before moving my way as well. Them, I expected to see, but Ethan? He looked back at me from where he was sitting on the couch. “How’re you feeling?” Tex’s hands skimmed my face, my shoulders, my arms. “Not like you’re going to shift?”

“Nope.” I gave his hands a squeeze, then stepped backwards.

“You’re crowding Nadia.”

Grey stood off to one side, arms crossed as he inspected me closely. It felt like those cool eyes saw right down into the depths of my soul.

“I’m not crowding her. Nadia, I’m not, am I?”

Looking up and seeing Tex’s befuddled expression had me smiling.

“A little.” His face fell. “But it’s not so much what you’re doing as…” I could either stay silent, just like Mum and Dad, or I could use my words like a big girl. “I’m not used to this much attention from anyone, let alone two guys.”

“Three guys,” Tex said, steering me towards the lounge suite.

“Yeah, but Ethan’s just a friend.” I flopped down on the couch beside the alpha in question. “What’re you watching?”

“Um… the replay of the footy,” Ethan said, looking over at me.

“Footy?” I made a show of gagging. “That’s so boring. How do you feel about ice hockey?”

“Oh no…” Tex groaned.

“Never really watched it,” Ethan replied.

I couldn’t help but grin.

“Well, let me introduce you to the awesomeness of sports romance. Much more interesting.” I plucked the remote from his grip. “Sex scenes, full-frontal nudity.”

“What she’s not saying is it’s blokes with their dicks out, not women,” Tex added.

“Shh…” Flicking through the channels, I found the series I’d started yesterday. “Whaddya say, buddy? Can we watch this instead? Tex can catch you up on the storyline.”

Ethan smiled slowly and for some reason that had something tightening in my chest. He turned towards me, arm going along the back of the couch, close enough to touch me if he wanted to.

He didn’t.

“Whatever the omega wants,” he said.

“Good answer.” Turning back to face the TV was a relief of sorts. The hot guys were contained to the screen, forever untouchable. “Shit, we need snacks!”

“I’ll get the snacks.”