Page 75 of Roping Her Alien Ranchers

Suddenly, my entire epidermis felt parched, as if the mere awareness of the moisture unit’s failure had triggered a delayed reaction. My respiratory surfaces contracted uncomfortably, and a new sensation—thirst, I recognized—swept through me with unexpected intensity.

I cradled Manji 2 carefully in the cradle of two tentacles as I flowed upright, the rest of my appendages moving in fluid coordination. Despite the discomfort, I marveled at how easily I maintained balance without the moisture that had once been essential to my species’ movement.

“I require hydration,” I informed the cat, who blinked lazily up at me as I carried her. “Tammy mentioned a ‘bathtub’ that sounds ideal for total immersion.”

I moved toward the ship’s exit, my mind already calculating the most efficient path to the farmhouse bathroom. An eternity-long soak—that would solve the immediate problem. And perhaps, if I were fortunate, I might encounter Tammy along the way.

28

CYRO

Who is this joyful Marvin fellow, and how did he discover sexual healing?

The dusty particles swirled through shafts of afternoon sunlight as Tammy led me into the revitalized structure where her equine specimens were housed. Kalith had gone overboard in here, gilding the padlocks and adding numerous transparent panels for increased light entry.

“I love all the windows. It’s so much brighter in there,” Tammy said, tilting her face up to look. The sun rays bathed across her face, making her seem to glow. She was a stunning human. Not that I’d seen many humans. Even so, I had little doubt she was a magnificent example of her kind.

“Yes, Kalith has done a satisfactory job,” I nodded.

“It’s way better than just satisfactory, Cyro,” she teased.

“It is better than just satisfactory,” I allowed. She scrunched her face, then rolled her eyes.

I took a deep breath. The air carried complex organic compounds, and they were a warm greeting.

I recognized them easily now as manure, leather, and the distinct musk of the large Earth mammals themselves. The scents seeped into my olfactory channels, alongside the increasingly potent perfume of Tammy herself. It was a combination of what she called “vanilla shampoo” and her own unique biochemical signature. That smell continued to affect my nervous system in ways I could not understand. The mere proximity of the human Omega caused my senses to go haywire at times.

“Do you really think you can get them to breed?” Tammy sounded anxious, stopping and turning around to face me. She was chewing on her lower lip in that way I now found endearing, though at first I thought it was a strange, species-specific behavior that happened in times of high emotion.

I nodded, clutching the small case containing my pheromone devices. “The environmental conditions appear adequate. Temperature and humidity levels fall within acceptable parameters for reproductive activity. I have observed them behaviorally and believe I know what is creating the physical divide between the two animals.”

“But it’s not just science,” she protested. “Horses are like people. You can’t force them to mate.”

“I am confident in my analysis and plan,” I protested.

Tammy’s mouth quirked up at one corner. “Well, that’s not quite enough, science boy.” She moved to a dusty shelf where an antiquated audio device sat. “We need some mood music.”

“Mood... music?” I repeated, the concept completely foreign to me. On my world, reproductive activities were scheduled according to biological cycles and chemical compatibility, not auditory stimulation.

Tammy pressed a button, and the device emitted a series of disruptive crackling sounds before a low, melodic human voice filled the stable. The vocal patterns were unlike anything I’d heard on Earth thus far—deep, sensual, with rhythmic instrumental accompaniment that seemed designed to mimic biological functions.

“The one. The only. Marvin The Marvelous Gaye,” Tammy announced with satisfaction. “Classic baby-making music.”

I tilted my head, analyzing the sonic patterns. It was at least less jarring than the horrid music she’d played in the house. What was it again? Eighties makeover madness? I shook my head. I understood sound input on a sonic level, applied to various experiments. I understood the vibrations of it that some on my planet purely enjoyed. But it had no place in reproduction.

“You believe auditory stimulation will encourage reproductive compatibility between two equines who have previously displayed antagonistic behavior?”

She turned to me with those bright blue eyes that reminded me of the rare cerulean pools on my home world. “You obviously need a crash course in what the right kind of song will do in the bedroom. Duration,” she ticked off on her fingers, “speed, rhythm. All the good stuff.”

I processed this information, finding it both primitive and strangely intriguing. “Still, I do not believe healing sexually will happen, no matter how happy this Marvin human may be.”

Tammy laughed, the sound causing a pleasant ripple of warmth across my skin beneath my human disguise. “Just set up your alien love potion contraptions while I bring in the happy couple.”

I knelt and opened my case, revealing the six small devices I’d constructed from components salvaged from our ship combined with materials from Tammy’s kitchen. Each was approximately three centimeters in diameter, with a specialized emission port designed to release synthesized pheromones calibrated specifically for Earth equines.

“These will release compounds that mimic the biochemical signals produced during peak fertility cycles,” I explained as I positioned the first device in a corner of the enclosure. “I analyzed hair samples from both specimens and identified the specific chemical signatures their bodies produce when receptive to mating.”

“Uh-huh,” Tammy replied, clearly more focused on leading Mystery into the enclosure. The stallion’s muscles rippled beneath his mahogany coat as he tossed his head, nostrils flaring at the unfamiliar scents my devices were beginning to emit.