Page 71 of Cosplay & Consequences

“You’re not going to watch?” Jess gave me a disappointed pout.

I winced. “I can’t stand seeing myself act. Every time I see myself it makes me cringe.”

“Alfie is going to ask you about it, so get over yourself,” Paige said, clearing the table.

“C’mon!” Jess shouted and grabbed my hand. She dragged me to the couch, where Faye had connected her phone to the TV to share the trailer. “I want to see it, and I want to watch it with you.”

I groaned. “You understand that this is torture for me, right? It’s like when you hear your own voice on a voicemail message, but you have to see yourself talking instead, which makes it a hundred times worse.”

“It’ll be fun!” Jess pushed me onto the couch. “If your voice bothers you, plug your ears.”

“Besides, who uses voicemail anyways?” Faye pointed out as she sat down next to me. “Use text messages like God intended us to.”

She refreshed the social media account for Tyrant a few times until the preview picture of the trailer showed up. The ladies all cheered, but what I noticed was the graphic editing job had done something fancy with my wig. It immediately took me out of the experience.

Faye tapped her phone, and I saw myself on the screen. Jess leaned on my shoulder as she snaked her arm through mine, and I did my best not to cringe. Watching the trailer was torture. Everyone else saw Tyrst’an, but I only saw myself pretending. I could see where Alfie had edited multiple takes into another, and I could barely stand watching. I concentrated on the special effects they had added with the green screen. They had chosen the ruin in Glen Orrin as the backdrop as that seemed appropriate for the upcoming season. Jess squeezed my hand, and Faye practically vibrated in excitement. Paige stood behind the couch the entire time watching. As it got toward the end, her hand gripped my shoulder.

When the trailer ended, Jess cheered. Faye screeched and bounced on the couch.

Paige gave me a quick hug from behind, and her voice was in my ear. “Dad would have loved this.”

My chest tightened, and my eyes welled up with tears. I could imagine my dad behind the couch shouting and throwing his fists up into the air. I wished he could have seen this.

Paige gave my shoulder a pat before she pulled away and headed towards the bedroom. As she walked away, she wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand.

I took a deep breath. Next to me, Faye and Jess already had their phones out.

“I liked it first!” Faye called out.

“I got fourth!” Jess said, scrambling to type a comment. “I’m posting it to my social media feed.”

“I’m sending it to your book club and the Patreon list,” Faye called out.

“Ooo! Thank you. I’ll go straight to my streaming platform and repost it there.”

Faye gave me a nudge with her elbow. “You should post it, too.”

After the last few weeks, I didn’t want to do anything with social media. “Just take care of it for me.”

“What do you want me to say for a caption?”

I took a moment, thinking back to a quote towards the end of the fourth book, The Overwhelming Tide. “If dawn breaks ,and we are still standing, only then shall the world remember our deeds here.”

I hadn’t realized I had dropped into the voice I use for Tyrst’an. Everyone in the room smirked at me.

“Thank God I’m moving to Toronto, so I don’t have to listen to that voice every day,” Paige snarked as she snatched Faye’s phone out of her hand.

“Hey!” Faye screeched. “What are you doing?”

“Grounded for life,” Paige reminded her.

I started laughing and kept laughing until I couldn’t breathe.

It was the last day of the con, and a good number of attendees were leaving instead of hanging out for the remaining panels. After the trailer, Jess had another panel to participate in, giving me free time before my session with Jorge. I texted Sebastian to see if we could grab lunch again before he flew out tonight for a guest role on Crime and Justice.

On my way to the cafe, I got stopped four times by fans who wanted selfies with me. It was a jarring experience. After the first two years on Minutes, the celebrity shine on me waned. I could go wherever I pleased with only someone recognizing me once or twice a month. Now I couldn’t walk down the street without people turning to look at me. When I walked into the restaurant, the hostess who didn’t give me a second thought earlier in the week, seated me ahead of others who had been waiting twenty minutes. As I waited for Sebastian, I had four different wait staff check on me within a span of five minutes. I even got an appetizer I didn’t order or want as Sebastian arrived for lunch.

Most actors would love this treatment. I dreaded it. I wondered if this meant I would have to start wearing sunglasses and ball caps again at the grocery store or when I dropped Faye off at school. It’s not that I mind the fans, it was the baggage that went with it.