Page 89 of Break Me Not

For the first time in my life, I was able to push off all the stress and just be present. So, instead of worrying about what could possibly be awaiting over the horizon, I just lived.

“Liz,” I said after a moment. Her eyes fluttered open, warm brown pools looking at me with so much emotion. A part of me might always feel like I didn’t deserve it, but the rest of me was willing to take the risk anyway. “I want you to be my forever.”

Her eyes widened, and then a slow smile spread across her face.

“Rushing straight into it, aren't we?” The warm teasing in her tone had my cheeks heating, but I couldn’t stop now.

I ran my hand down her face. “I don't think I can hold back anymore. I was worried that I was being selfish for wanting you. That I didn't deserve someone like you. But I know what I want, and this is not just some stupid crush on someone I thought was unavailable to me. That I could never have.”

“Unavailable? Never? Wow,” she said with a chuckle. But her hand came up, and she threaded her fingers through mine.

“And you can take however long you need, but I want to tell you that this isn't going to go away for me. I never told anyone this before… I think I'm falling in love with you.”

She opened her mouth, but no sound came out. The longer she was silent, the more it felt that I’d spoken too soon. I watched emotions run through her as I tried to find something to say to cut through whatever this was until she finally settled on a small smile.

“And here I thought I would be the one to say it first.”

What did she just say?

My heart pounded so fast in my chest, I was afraid it would burst out. And then the happiness came. An unbridled happiness I’d never felt before started taking over my entire body.

I couldn't help myself. I leaned over just as she pushed herself up so we could kiss.

I kissed her like it was the first and last time. I kissed her without holding back. I wanted her to feel my love. And she reciprocated every single ounce.

When we parted, we were breathless.

“Is this too fast?” I asked her.

Her hands came to run through my hair the way I liked it while we stayed just as we were—faces pushed together, lips centimeters apart. And then she shook her head.

“I was worried about that too. But the more I'm with you, the less I want to be apart. The more this feels right.”

“Then it's official? You're mine?”

She chuckled and gave me a quick peck on the lips. “It's more accurate to say that you're mine.”

Something more serious fell between us then.

“This means we have to tell her.”

“I can do it,” I said quickly. “I know how good your relationship is, and I would never want to ruin that. I'd rather⁠—”

“Ruin her only friendship?”

“I'm not her only friend,” I corrected. She pulled away to look at me.

“No, just her best friend.”

I had nothing to say to that. Because it was the truth. And that didn't help the guilt I felt, but I knew—and now I knew Liz did too—that it didn’t matter how wrong it seemed to anyone else. There was no denying the two of us.

“I’ll tell her,” Liz said. “I have a lunch date with her in two days, and then we can go to my office to talk. Ideally, I would like to do this at home but… you know.”

Claire didn’t know what had happened, just as she didn’t know her father was around, and there was no way to explain why Liz was in my apartment without all of it being out in the open.

“Are you okay to do this?”

“I have to be.”