Page 60 of Break Me Not

“I struggle with…” She paused. “I want to be wanted.”

I nodded as I tried to wrap my head around those words.

“I would be very surprised if no one has wanted you.”

I was trying to make light of it by obviously referencing how hot she was, but her smirk didn’t last long enough.

“I did grow up to be pretty hot, I have to admit. Thanks for noticing. But… I was an unwanted child. I don’t want to get into the specifics, but that followed me into middle and high school, and people… really didn’t like the weird kid.”

She took her silverware and started playing with her food. I recognized it as a way not to meet my gaze.

“I was bullied and didn’t have any friends, so I found myself being a punching bag until I decided to start fighting back. Once they realized they couldn’t fight me, they moved on to… other targets. Kind of why I started my security company. But anyway, no, I didn’t have girlfriends in the sense people usually mean it. I don’t have experience with serious relationships. And I just want to be… wanted.”

She let out a long breath and refused to look at me, so I reached over and grabbed her hand.

“After the divorce, I thought I would never feel desire again. I didn’t know what it meant. In my mind, it was… unthinkable that anyone would want someone like me. I was damaged goods.” I held my hand up when she opened her mouth. “Was. You have definitely changed things for me. And I want you to know you are wanted. I want you. And…”

I closed my mouth, pushing my lips into a tight line. How far am I willing to go with this? How much do I actually want to tell her?

“I care about you,” I finally landed on.

I didn’t tell her how she was constantly on my mind. How I missed her when she wasn’t around. How, when she’d walked in, my heart had dropped to the floor, and I truly felt like something awful had happened.

How all I wanted to do was fix it and make it so she never made that face again.

That felt like too much.

She finally looked up at me and smiled. That smile had butterflies unleashing in my tummy.

“So it’s not just my irresistible body that you’re after?”

The teasing in her tone had me relaxing in my seat.

“No,” I said with a laugh. “Not just that. But that’s a plus, don’t get me wrong or anything.”

“Good,” she said, and lifted another bite to her mouth. “Because otherwise I’d worry this thing was just one-sided.”

I averted my gaze then and fully focused on my food, making her laugh this time.

God, this feels like everything I’ve been missing.

It felt… good. More than good.

And the longer the night went on, the harder it was for me to convince myself there was anything wrong with it.

Jax

Punishment.

The word sounded sweet. It was everything I’d been dreaming about since I first bought Liz at the auction.

My skin was itching for it. My body felt sensitive at all times.

But it hadn’t happened yet. And it was killing me.

Something had changed in Liz that night, and she wasn't trying to fight us anymore. We were no longer avoiding each other. We’d have breakfast and spend our nights together—that is, when we made it home on time.

To be fair, work was kicking both our asses.