Page 61 of Playing with Fire
“Gardener.”
I needed more of that growl. “People are going to ask if I’m your ugly sister or something. Then the men are going to start hitting on me so their sisters might get a chance to have you.”
“Gardener!”
Score. “That’s punishment for that travesty you named Suzy in the break room. Who uses such a cheap pathetic coffee maker in such a nice place?”
“Hear, hear!” the cops cheered. Then, a chaotic chorus of catcalls filled the station.
“Down with Suzy!”
“Can we keep the barista full time?”
“Hey, Gardener! You can come home with me anytime.”
I blinked since the last comment had come from one of the women. “You just want me for my coffee, don’t you.”
“Don’t forget to bring the dust. Your dust is the best.”
With my certifications, I could contact a supplier and put in a few orders for dust. Happy cops made for a happy city, right? Maybe if I got Quinn happy enough, he’d keep me happy.
“I don’t like that look on your face, Gardener. You’re scheming something.”
Damn it. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Chief Quinn. We need to go to the bank and deal with Suzy. Now.”
Quinn sighed. “Is your SUV here today, Perkins?”
“For the honor of watching Gardener kill Suzy so we can have good coffee, I would love to drive you around in my SUV, Chief Quinn.”
“Why do I feel like you all like Gardener more than you like me?” Quinn shot a glare at me, and if it weren’t for his mouth twitching in an effort not to grin, I might’ve been worried.
“She’s going to make us coffee, Chief.” Perky widened his eyes and swooned against Nilman.
Nilman shoved Perky upright. “He’s right, sir. You make us coffee, but we’ve been considering asking the CDC to give it a hazard rating.”
I smiled, skipped my way to the elevator, and pressed the down button. “Bailey Gardener, Goddess of Coffee.”
“Calamity Queen,” Quinn muttered.
Kicking would be a lot more effective if the man stopped dodging me. “Stay still, you.”
“No.”
“Bah.”
In the downstairs garage, we piled into Perky’s black SUV, and Quinn sat in the back with me. “Take us to the bank, first. Gardener needs to deposit a check.”
I gave Perky directions to the nearest branch. It took twenty minutes and a call to the CDC to confirm I really was a newly fledged millionaire for the bank to deposit my check. The reality of the situation shocked me even more than the teller, who could see my pitiful balances over the course of my entire adult life. Updating my home address to Quinn’s place took an extra fifteen minutes, and I ultimately needed to wave him over so he could present his badge and his driver’s license to convince the teller I was staying at his place until further notice. He even promised to submit better proof of residency later.
Within ten minutes, I bet the rumor mill would get hold of the news and go wild with it.
Worse, the woman drooled over Quinn, and I barely escaped the bank without trying to kill her.
“You’re so jealous,” he whispered in my ear on our way out. “Come on. Teach me the errors of my coffee-making ways instead of trying to murder a swooning bank teller.”
“I thought we were going on a drive.”
“We’ll get to that part eventually. First, I need to buy the good will of my officers, so when I do return to the station, they don’t stage a mutiny.”
