Page 39 of Maleen

I spin towards him, unable to help the small smile that’s struggling to stay hidden. As if I would be getting excited over the fact I want my mate to try to kill me. Maybe I’m as crazy as Jesper.

“Not crazy,” he adds. “Delightfully unhinged.”

My head shakes at his charming absurdity before I block him out, focusing on Kill. “I promise. You won’t hurt me.” I will say it as many times as he needs to hear it.

He takes a deep breath and I feel his magick flare out around him. His body straightens, his corded muscles ripple and for the first time in a long time I feel more like prey than a warrior. Yet I’m not scared… I’m excited.

My chin dips. I’m ready.

His quads bunch a millisecond before he moves and I don’t blink. I need to show him I’m not scared. That he has no reason to fear us interacting.

The tip of the dagger stops right at my leather chestplate and then clatters to the dirt a second later.

His shoulders shake as he falls to his knees, panting. “I didn’t think it would work…” his deep baritone shakes as he pulls me into his arms. “I’m so sorry. I’m—”

“Shh, there’s no need to apologize, Kill. I know it will take time, and we will have our bumps, but you don’t need to worry about this.”

Even though he’s on his knees he’s still able to bury his head into my neck. “You’ll remind me when I forget?”

“Always.”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

THE BEIGE CANOPY OF THE tent is darkened with the night. It’s all I’ve been able to stare at as sleep eludes me. Questions upon questions rattle through my mind as I try for what feels like the millionth time to silence the noise plaguing my brain. How was my mother able to throw up a magick wall around the city? Why hasn’t it weakened over time? How in the fucking Fates do I get past it? And what is left of my home besides the ruins I caught a glimpse of from atop Vasari’s back?

My mates’ gentle snores fill the tent and Jesper mumbles in his sleep incoherently. Except for the word ‘blood’. That came out just fine, along with a sleepy cackle of glee.

With a sigh, I unravel myself from my blanket and slowly crawl out of my bedroll. There’s no point in trying to sleep any longer. The birds are starting their morning singing and it will only be a matter of time before the camp is lively again and everyone’s staring at me they wait on me to figure this out.

“Where are you going, Little Warrior?” Killian rumbles, his voice startling me from my musings.

My hand flies to my chest as I suck in a sharp, yet quiet breath, startled. “I can’t sleep. Why are you awake?”

He sits up. “Can’t sleep either,” he mumbles, his red eyes piercing me even in the dark. “You didn’t answer my question.”

I place my hand on the hilt of my sword that I donned only moments ago. “I was going to get some air. Maybe watch the sun rise and stare at the fucking wall,” I sigh, using my other hand to rub my forehead. The thought of trying to figure it out—potentially for days—is already giving me a headache.

Killian grunts and climbs out of his bedroll before rising to his full height. Well, kind of: his neck is tilted a bit to the side as his head brushes the roof of the tent. “I’ll come. You shouldn’t be wandering alone.”

I nearly roll my eyes but I understand his protectiveness, and he is right. With the attempts on my life and the near constant ambushes, I need to be more aware and keep my wits about me. “I would like that very much, thank you.”

“Rav?” Nero’s sleepy voice enters my mind.

I glance over at him on the little earthen perch I magicked for him before bed. “Just going on a walk with Kill. Sleep; I’ll wake you if anything exciting happens.”

He sighs and nestles back down. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” he mumbles before falling back asleep.

“Shall we?” I whisper to Kill, gesturing to the tent door, with a small smile tugging at my lips. Some time alone with him is maybe exactly what we need. After all, I’m hoping that yesterday’s display of my mate bond theory would ease his worries, and maybe we can finally move forward.

He moves without another word, and I quickly glance around the tent at my other sleeping mates, glad I didn’t wake them. They need as much rest as they can get.

I dip out of the tent, the flap falling quietly behind me as I suck in a breath of fresh dewy morning air. The stars are still out and the moon hangs regally in the sky, nearly full. It’s a beautiful night despite everything that’s happening around us in the realm, like the oppression of the lesser fae and non magicals, the corrupted and missing dragons, my mother and the kingdom she locked away.

“What are you thinking about?” Killian asks as I fall into step beside him.

I peer up at him out of the corner of my eye. “Everything. Sometimes I wish for the peace we had as fledglings, hiding under that table with our books again when everything got to be too much. Except back then our problems seemed much smaller.”

He hums, and we fall into a comfortable silence as we make our way toward the boundary and the path bordered by forest beyond it that we can’t walk down. After a moment he speaks. “Those memories got me through a lot. I would slip into the thoughts of you and your fairytales that you’d whisper aloud. Tales of princes and love. Even though I never thought I would have those things, especially after I lost you… You helped even when you were gone.”