Page 6 of Puck Me Back to Life

No expectations.

Just two men sitting in a living room.

“Take your time.”

Riley exhales heavily. “I thought I'd like this more.”

There it is.

I nod slowly. I'm not surprised. He seemed like he was the type who just says yes so he could sleep with me. But when I asked him over and over again if he was sure he had insisted that this is what he wanted.

My shoulders sag slightly with disappointment. Not in him. Just in the situation.

“I appreciate you telling me.”

Riley laughs awkwardly. “You're taking this way better than I thought.”

“What did you expect?”

“I don't know. For you to be mad.”

I lean back against the couch. The idea is almost funny.

“Why would I be mad?”

His expression says he doesn't have an answer.

Neither of us says anything for a few seconds.

Eventually, Riley sighs. “I think I liked the idea of this.”

I nod.

That makes sense. It happens more often than people think. A lot of men are attracted to confidence.

Control. Authority. They see someone like me and assume they'll enjoy everything that comes along with it. Then reality shows up. Reality tends to be less sexy than fantasy.

“I'm sorry,” Riley says.

I hate that. The apology. The guilt. Like he's done something wrong.

“You don't have anything to apologize for.”

“I kinda do.”

“No.” I shake my head.

“Actually, this is exactly what you're supposed to do.”

He looks confused.

“If something isn't working, you stop. That's the whole point.”

The tension in his shoulders relaxes slightly. “You're not upset?”

I consider the question. The honest answer is complicated. “I'm disappointed.”

His face falls.