Page 17 of When Ashes Fall

I didn’t get a chance to look at the shifter before Devnair turned me and we strolled back toward the hall. Dromon waited for us to pass him; once we did, he fell in behind us again.

“Why did you ask if I was different before I met Seth or not until afterward?” I asked, recalling our earlier conversation.

“I was curious if the casters are all heartless fucks from birth or if they only become such exorbitant pricks after their Needing and binding to their gods. Did finding love as a child change you, or were you born different from them?”

I pondered this before replying. “Most of the children in our kingdom are delightful. Some are cruel, but most are sweet and kind. You may not believe this, but my mother deeply loves my sister. They’re not overly affectionate, but the love is clear between them.

“However, the adults in our kingdom are very different from the children. I don’t know if it’s time that beats them down and changes them, the Needing, or the binding.”

“The Needing didn’t change you.”

“I didn’t go through it like the others. I wasn’t in the harem. Maybe that made the difference.”

“Knox, or the other shifters, didn’t help you through it?”

My mouth dropped. “That’s a little personal, don’t you think?”

His eyes glittered with amusement. “Yes, it is personal, but it’s also a valid question.”

“Knox helped me through it.”

Of course, it wasn’t in the way Devnair assumed, as we didn’t have sex, but he’d been there through it. I trusted the elf, but not with this.

I didn’t know why, but something deep inside told me to keep the truth of my Needing from him. I still had no idea what I’d become, and I was sure Devnair would be shocked enough by my revelation to tell others about it.

“I knew there was still chemistry between you, and he clearly doesn’t like you being alone with another man… even if sometimes you might prefer to kill each other,” he said.

“Not sometimes… most of the time.”

“Anger and chemistry. It’s a potent mix.”

“One that might kill us both.”

He chuckled. “But it might be a lovely way to go… or at least very enjoyable.”

I didn’t share his sentiment about that, but I let it go. “Hmm,” I grunted. “Knox told me the day casters also rape others in the harem. My mother told me they didn’t have sex in there but pleasured themselves. Is that true?”

I regretted asking the question when Devnair stopped walking and his friendly demeanor turned colder. The twinkle faded from his eyes.

“Knox wasn’t lying to you,” he confirmed.

“I didn’t think he was, but had to be sure.”

Dromon prowled closer. He’d sensed a change in Devnair’s demeanor, and Dromon would never let something happen to Knox’s mate… or rejected mate… or… or whatever I was to that confounding man.

Shaking his head, Devnair cleared his mind of his dismal thoughts as his gaze shifted to me again, and warmth returned to his eyes. We resumed walking.

“What about your powers now that you’re unbound to the gods?” he asked.

I hadn’t told anyone about my newfound ability to communicate with Gizzi, or the voice in the woods, and I wasn’t going to tell him about it either.

“I gain more energy from plants and nature than I did before,” I said. “And my potions are stronger, as are the powers I already had, but so far, those are the only differences I’ve detected.”

“So you don’t gain more power from the sun or moon like the night and day casters?”

“No.”

I didn’t remind him that we stood in a kingdom where the sun and moon were rarely visible. Things could change once I exposed myself to them.