Page 32 of Hooked

“What’s the right thing to do?” I asked him. “Is it my responsibility? Am I responsible for the uncle who sold me, or the mother who gave me up without a fight? Is any of this my responsibility!?”

“I don’t know,” he answered quietly.

Of course he didn’t know. How could he have the answers to a situation he knew very little about? Especially when I myself had no idea. Still, I wished someone could tell me how to proceed.

I stared at Falstone, wanting to think of anything other than Captain Huckley and the hellfire that would soon rain down on me because of him. Because it would. I knew that deep down in my gut. I knew he would not leave me be. But there were no answers to be had and I just wanted to think on something else. Anything else. Studying Falstone’s face inevitably brought my mind to the fact that he’d kissed me. Quite boldly. Fervently, even.

My face heated and I looked away. He’d given me my first kiss for the sake of a ruse. Where did that leave us? Had he enjoyed kissing me? Was it merely an act of duty? And what did he think of me now, as he sat there, watching me slowly unravel? Perhaps he regretted the token kiss he’d given me.

Had I enjoyed kissing him? Yes.

Though it surprised me, the truth was quite obvious. His kiss was…I mentally sighed…lovely. A bit too much at the end, but that didn’t negate the fact that those first few seconds had been blissful enough to nearly make me forget my troubles.

I shook those thoughts loose. I had much more pressing matters. “If your father were in trouble, would you help him?”

He thought for several long moments. “I suppose…if he asked.”

“And if he didn’t? But you knew he was in trouble?”

He blew out a breath then shrugged. “It’s impossible to say without knowing the reasons for the problem. I hope I’m a good enough person to want to help, but I also appreciate the virtue of dealing with the consequences of your own actions.”

My chest and throat ached with the pressure of my feelings. “I should not want my mother to suffer. Life has not been kind to her. But as much as I want to be a good person, I find I am not willing to sacrifice myself for her.” I choked on the last words as guilt rose up, strangling my voice.

“No child should have to make that choice.”

I turned my hands up. They were empty, offering none of the answers that I sought, so I let them fall back to my sides before resuming my pacing. My mind once again filled up with all the what-ifs, the doubts and questions.

“I think I should kiss you now.”

His words brought me up short and my chin pulled back. It was exactly what he’d said to me in the hallway when Huckley had been watching. I looked about the room in an obvious way, gesturing to the corners of the room. “There is no one here to pretend for, Falstone.” I went back to pacing and chewing my thumb.

“I think I should kiss you anyway.”

I finally stopped and really looked at him. He sat there, his body coiled with tension and his eyes looking at me in a way that reminded me of our conversation in the library, except that this was…more.

Oh.

Perhaps his reasons for kissing me before had not only been for the ruse.

I fell back a step, my hand going to my heart then my throat before I clutched it with my other hand, bringing them both down to hold them tightly against my stomach.

His eyes never left my face. “Will you let me kiss you, Cecily?”

I took one tremulous breath before saying, “Yes.”

His eyebrows jumped, probably even more surprised by my easy agreement than I was.

I took a step forward and he eagerly pushed to his feet.

“There you are, Cecily,” Marilee declared as she breezed into the room.

Falstone and I both tried to skitter away from one another while turning to acknowledge Her Highness.

My face was aflame.

She reached a hand out to me. “Come along. Tea is set out on the veranda.”

I ducked my head and joined her, grateful that she didn’t seem to notice anything amiss.