Page 30 of Hooked

“Don’t look so frightened,” he warned in a whisper. “Captain Huckley has us in his sights. I believe he is trying to catch us in a lie, so if you don’t mind, I think the best course of action would be for me to kiss you so that he will have proof of the veracity of my claim on you.”

“Oh…” Oh!

He shifted even closer, leaning in, dipping his head. He was in earnest. He was going to kiss me right here and right now, and I wanted him to yet I didn’t, but I really truly wished for it.

“May I?” he asked, the warmth of his words hitting my lips.

He should. Because Captain Huckley was watching, and Falstone was trying to save me from that beast of a man, and it was important that we convince him to leave. “Yes,” I breathed. “That would probably be—” Falstone swallowed my last word as his mouth fell on mine.

It was shocking, that first touch of his lips. Frightening and beautiful and ever so delicious. Unexpected. A melting warmth pooled in my head and seeped down into my heart. I had not thought I would enjoy such a thing. But this was Falstone, and even if it wasn’t real, he was so gentle and I sensed the caring behind his actions.

Then he slipped a hand behind my head and pulled me more fully to him and the kiss shifted. It wasn’t just caring or protectiveness. This felt like something more…visceral. More intense. Just more.

Too much more.

I stiffened. I wasn’t ready for such a thing. It was too new and confusing.

He pulled back immediately, breaking the kiss, but then pulling me to his chest, letting me rest my head there as I breathed heavily, my mind whirring as he held me lightly, giving me time to recover.

“I’m sorry,” he said after a moment.

“Are you?” He hadn’t seemed sorry when he’d been kissing me, and I didn’t think I wanted him to be sorry.

“I’m sorry I frightened you.”

I wanted to deny it, to tell him I was fine, but he had frightened me. So instead I asked, “Is he gone?”

Falstone pulled back, caressing my cheek and tucking an auburn curl back under my mop cap—keeping up the charade—before taking my hand and pulling me from the recessed doorway. He looked up casually, but I knew that it wasn’t casual at all. “Yes, I believe he has gone. But I would rather not leave you alone until I am certain he has left the property entirely.”

He followed my lead, allowing me to tug him toward the stairs that led to the servants’ quarters. He walked me up the steps then let me go, watching over me until I had shut myself in my room. There, I was free to panic and pace and try desperately to suck enough air into my lungs so that I wouldn’t feel light-headed.

The kiss was secondary. Yes, it took up a portion of my thoughts. Thoughts that wondered if there had been any sincerity behind it at all, or if he truly had been toying with me despite his intentions being noble. Thoughts of how much I had wanted that kiss to continue, but also how much it terrified me.

But despite the tumult of those thoughts, they didn’t hold a candle to the raging maelstrom swirling in my head over the appearance of Captain Huckley. There had been a moment, that moment when I had said no, when I believed that my bravery would be enough and I would be able to purge him from my life with nothing but my will and my friends by my side.

Of course, it couldn’t be that easy. All the gumption in the world wouldn’t make him give me up. Only a bald-faced lie had made him leave, and I didn’t believe for a moment that he was gone for good.

***

The next day, I went about my morning duties with false cheer, using up what little energy I had to put on a good face. Marilee didn’t need to worry about my difficulties. I was certain she felt helpless as it was and I had no desire to add to her distress.

When she went to have her daily meeting with Beatrice about the running of the house, I wandered outside, down the lane that led to the road. Should I be packing my things right now and fleeing? Should I be running away to somewhere Huckley might not find me?

A deep-seated struggle raged within me: the fear driving me to go as far away from here as possible, my hope begging me to stay among the peace and friends I had found here. Perhaps I could simply go into Murrwood village and find a temporary position there. If the captain came back, Her Highness could tell him I was long gone. I’d run away before, why not do it again? But who would hire me? And how long would I have to stay away before it felt safe to return?

Though my head begged me to head for the road, my feet could only shuffle along, and I made little progress down the lane. An obliging rock offered itself up and I sat on it, too tired to do anything but deal with my warring emotions. I didn’t want to run again. But if I didn’t, would I ever feel safe? Would running make me feel safe?

There was no clear answer to such a question. It had been so many years since I had been in this situation that the shock of it all jumbled everything together. The only thing I could see was the tumult.

The crunch of footsteps approaching should have entered my consciousness much earlier than it did. Instead, it wasn’t until he called my name that I caught on to the fact that someone stood in front of me. I had lost all awareness of my physical surroundings.

“Cecily?”

This time I looked up. Falstone filled my view, the sun behind his head lighting his hair like a halo. He was standing there in his uniform. Leather tunic, weapons hanging at his belt, granite strength, and a look of concern so profound that it nearly stole the air from my lungs. All I could do was blink up at him.

He crouched down, carefully resting a hand on my knee. “What are you doing out here?” he asked.

I looked about, taking in the tree-lined drive and feeling the rock beneath me. “I don’t know.” When my gaze returned to him, his brow had furrowed further.