Page 278 of Cross Check

Lainey

Checking in on you, sweetie. Did you eat breakfast?

Me

I had soup for dinner last night. Haven’t managed to keep anything down this morning.

Sienna

Maybe try some oatmeal? Or something easy on your stomach like rice?

Me

Maybe.

Lainey

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, Amelia. I wish we were there to help.

Me

It’s my own doing. I knew this was a possibility when I first got involved with Grant.

I just hate that it’s playing out on such a public stage. I can’t focus on the gold medal game later today because I’m wondering if the people I pass are whispering about me being a slut.

Sienna

You’re not a slut.

Me

That’s not what the media thinks.

Sienna

Fuck the media. Uninstall your apps. Put your attention on the moment you’re in. You can figure everything else out later.

Lainey

And remember we love you. We’re here to support you however we can.

Me

Thank you. That means the world to me.

“You look like shit.” Emmy hands me a cup of coffee and closes the door to my tiny office in the locker room. “Caffeine was the best I could do. I thought bringing a handle of vodka into the arena before the big game might be frowned upon, but you’re the coach. Say the word, and I’ll make it happen.”

“Thank you. Coffee is fine.” I give her a weak smile and lift the cup in her direction. “I feel like shit too, so I’m glad that’s consistent across the board.”

“I know it’s been a hard week. Has Darcy called you?”

“About ten times. We have a meeting scheduled the day after I get back from Italy.” I rub the heel of my palm against my eye. I’ve had a permanent headache the last seven days, and I don’t know if it’s from crying myself to sleep or the lack of food and water. “I wish she would get my punishment out of the way so I don’t have to stew in anticipation over what’s going to happen to me.”

“She’s progressive. Maybe she’ll be lenient with a punishment.”

“Until investors and minority owners breathe down her neck and demand she fires me. Darcy will do what she has to do to keep her job safe and the money rolling in, and I won’t fault her for it.” I sigh and sip the caffeine. It’s too bitter, and I set the cup down. “Sports are a business, and having a coach who sleeps with players isn’t a good look for an organization that’s trying to cement themselves as a powerhouse in the NHL. Even if she does go easy on me, the league is going to have some sort of punishment too.”

“It’s such bullshit.” Emmy sighs. “How many of those investors have slept with their secretaries? Or been arrested for fraud? Why are you the one being singled out?” Her eyes meet mine. “How are you holding up?”