Page 65 of Experiments in Offline Dating

He glowered at me. “No.” We both bit into our sandwiches.

“Interesting. I didn’t know it was physically possible to chew and clench your jaw at the same time.” He rolled his eyes but gave me nothing. “Come on. We’re going to be stuck together for the next three weeks. I’m entitled to know something about you.”

“Only twenty days left. I’m marking it off on my diary.”

I grinned as I took another bite. “Tell me about farming.”

“Nothing to tell.”

“Do you enjoy it?”

“Yep.” His tone was clipped, but this wasn’t my first rodeo. I could tell I’d get something out of him if I pushed the right way.

“I’m genuinely interested. I’ve never met a farmer before. What do you like about it?”

“This isn’t one of your damn podcast interviews, Maya.”

“Please?”

He was quiet for a minute, and then his shoulders dropped and he let out a huff of surrender or annoyance—probably both. “Fine. I like that it’s quiet.” He gave me a dirty look to imply that I, on the other hand, was not nearly quiet enough, but then he went on. “I get to be outside every day. I can just focus on my work and ignore everything else. Don’t have to deal with people or run decisions past anyone. I don’t even look at my phone. I just . . . disconnect.”

I honestly hadn’t thought Tadhg and I had anything at all in common, so I was surprised to find that resonated with me. It sounded really nice, actually, like something I would want for myself. One day I’d retire and probably become a very happy hermit who only had to be around other people when she chose to be—people whom I loved and understood, and who understood me. People I didn’t have to second-guess every word around.

He took a bite and chewed, a little more relaxed. Then he said pretty much what I was thinking. “The sheep don’t care if I’m in a bad mood. I don’t have to watch what I say.”

“So that’s why you love sheep so much. They’re the only ones who don’t care if you’re an asshole.” I grinned at his scowl and bumped his shoulder with mine.

I felt my smile fade as I looked from his eyes to his mouth. If my mind went to visions of having sex in this cave and the way the sounds of pleasure would echo back, then I ignored it resolutely. I did not think that I might get trapped in there with Tadhg and that we might be forced to have a lot of vigorous sex to keep each other from freezing to death. I didn’t even think about thinking that!

“I love sheep so much because they don’t ask me stupid questions. Now get that cake down you so that we can get the hell out of here.” He was snapping, but I smiled softly at him—he had just shared something with me, and perhaps he regretted it now, but I felt like I’d won it.

Through the ceiling, the rain had begun to make its way in with more force, joining the gush of the waterfall. The cave had grown a little darker and decidedly wetter while we ate. My eyes had adjusted gradually, so I hadn’t noticed that the sun wasn’t washing the cave in a golden glow anymore. Now it looked pretty gray and stormy. Zero magical rainbows.

“Yeah, okay, fun sponge. The rain will clear up while we eat cake, and then we can have a nice, dry walk back.”

“Bollocks it will.”

I grinned and handed him a fork, and we took turns passing the box back and forth. It was so gooey and chocolatey that I actually moaned. “Yeah, I would accept any proposal if it came with a side of this chocolate cake.”

“I’ll be sure to get Ned the recipe in that case.”

I chewed and looked at him for a moment. “What’s it like being the son of a famous matchmaker?”

His whole body went rigid. He tossed his fork back in the cake box and stood up, brushing his jeans off. “It’s just peachy. Come on, let’s go.”

I considered forcing it—saying I wouldn’t leave until he answered my question. I did desperately want to know. But he had opened up a little bit before, and I didn’t want to spoil that by being too pushy and shutting him down to any future conversations.

Instead, I dug in my bag and pulled out the selfie stick Simone had bought me before I left, and snapped some pictures while I ate the last of the cake.

“Would now be a good time to tell you that you have chocolate all over your nose?” Tadhg offered only after I had packed the stick away and put the phone in a Ziploc bag.

I wiped my nose. He was right. Damn. I licked the frosting off my hand like an animal and smiled. “Oh well. Bonus frosting.”

“Gross.”

“You’re welcome.” I winked.

“All right, you’ve had enough. Pick up all this crap and let’s get out of here. That rain’s not getting any better. It’s worse, and we’ve lost time.”