Page 33 of Cipher

“I saw the way he watched you, Bex. And the way he shut it down.” Grinning, she did a little bounce on her seat. “I’ve been waiting for this ever since.”

“Me too,” I mumbled before taking a sip of my coffee.

“I know.” She reached out to pat my hand. “I’m really happy for you. You deserve someone who looks at you the way I just saw out there.”

I bit my bottom lip. “How did he look at me?”

“Like you’re the only thing he can see.”

“Wow.” I ducked my head and took a sip of coffee to buy myself a moment. Her smile was wide when I looked up again. “I guess you’d know since your baby daddy looks at you like that.”

She slid her hand over her still-flat stomach. “I should definitely call him that tonight.”

“Shhh.” I covered my hands with my ears. “These virgin ears don’t need to hear details like that.”

Jacqueline rolled her eyes and giggled. “I guess that answers one of my questions about you and Cipher.”

“We are not having this conversation.” I banged my head against the table with a groan.

“We’re best friends,” she argued. “If you’re going to talk to anyone about your sex life, it should be me.”

“It isn’t much of one,” I grumbled.

She wagged her brows. “I’m sure that’s going to change soon.”

“Yeah.” Considering how hard he was each morning and all the kisses, I had a feeling she was right. Even though I understood why he was waiting for the right moment, I was hoping it came sooner rather than later.

We sat in comfortable silence for a moment. Then the thought in the back of my mind all morning slipped out. “It’s killing me not knowing what he’s working on today.”

Jacqueline’s expression softened with understanding. “Yeah. That part takes some getting used to.”

“How do you do it?” I asked. “Isn’t it hard to accept that there are things Stryker can’t share with you?”

“I’m not saying it’s easy, but that’s the man I fell in love with.” She took another sip of her tea. “Being an old lady means accepting that Black Crowns justice doesn’t always look like the kind your dad deals out. And there will be things the men keep to themselves because it’s safer for everyone that way. But the same could be said for your mom and dad back in the day. I’m sure there was plenty of stuff he couldn’t share with her since he was a deputy.”

“Yeah.” I traced the rim of my mug, thinking about how my parents had been together, back before she’d been diagnosed with cancer when I was twelve. “Mom never gave him a hard time about it. She said that she knew what she was getting into when she fell for a police officer, so she couldn’t blame him for being the man she fell in love with.”

“Your mom was awesome like that.”

I nodded. “She really was.”

My best friend showed how well she knew me, sitting in silence while I thought about my mom. She’d been taken from us much too young, and I missed her every day. Especially now that I’d found a guy I could picture spending my life with.

“I know he’s got tattoos and is part of an MC, which makes him everything mothers usually warn their daughters about, but I think Mom actually would’ve liked Corbin for me.” I flashed her a watery smile. “He really listens to me and values my opinion. I’m not just the ‘sheriff’s daughter’ to him.”

Jacqueline sniffled. “That’s all you’ve ever wanted.”

“Yeah.”

“Cipher might not be able to tell you some stuff, but the upside is you’ll never need to worry about him lying to you.” She leaned back in her chair, her eyes getting the soft look that only Stryker gave her. “Brogan doesn’t pretend everything’s fine when it isn’t, and he shares what he can. Like when my safety is on the line. I know I can trust him. And when it comes to club business, I’d rather have silence than a pretty lie.”

I thought about the blunt way Corbin spoke, and his refusal to give an inch when he decided something. “I can see that absolutely being true about Corbin, too. He doesn’t waste words or try to make things easier to hear.”

“The fact that you can see that already means you’re further ahead than most. Just remember that loving one of them means making peace with the parts of their world that are kept from us for good reason.”

I stared down into my coffee, mulling her words over. As sad as I’d been about being away from Corbin for most of today, it really was good that I had this time with Jacqueline. If I was going to let myself fall even harder for him, it was good to know what I was getting into.

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