Page 10 of Worth the Risk
“I can’t believe this,” I said, pacing to the other side of my small living room and back again. I couldn’t seem to stand still. “Maybe I’m wrong about all this. I mean, maybe it was a bad batch of tea. Or maybe I’m getting a cold. That can mess with your sense of taste…”
Ruby raised one eyebrow. “Do you have congestion? A cough? A fever?”
“Don’t go all Nurse Ruby on me. I’m just saying that there are other explanations. I’m on the shot! I’m not supposed to have to worry about this.”
Ruby’s lips twitched, like she was trying not to laugh. “You’re freaking out, and I get it. Unplanned pregnancy is pretty huge. Life-changing even, but-”
“You’re not helping.”
She held up the bag with the tests. “I was going to say that there’s no point in panicking before you’ve even peed on a stick.”
I shook my head, even though I told her to bring the tests. It was a knee-jerk reaction to the thought that dysgeusia was a pregnancy symptom, a logical next step. But now that Ruby was here, and it was time to find out if I was actually pregnant, the possibility was suddenly too big, too overwhelming. I felt like I couldn’t even take a deep breath.
“I can’t be pregnant,” I murmured.
Ruby moved to stand in front of me, stopping my pacing. “Okay, let’s talk this out. Yeah, you’re on the shot, but nothing is one hundred percent effective. Even if you’re never late getting an injection, there’s a chance of getting pregnant. You wouldn’t be the first woman I’ve seen it happen to.”
I knew she was right, but that didn’t make it any easier to wrap my head around this.
“What about other symptoms?” Ruby asked. “Anything come to mind?”
I frowned as I thought about it. I didn’t usually have a period because of the birth control shot. My breasts weren’t tender. I hadn’t been nauseous.
“I’ve been tired,” I said with a shrug. “But I work in the emergency room. That can be exhausting.”
“Growing a human is also exhausting.”
I let out a groan and snatched the bag from her hand. “What kind of best friend won’t even let me live in denial for a while?”
Ruby chuckled. “The good kind. Now, get into that bathroom and let’s find out if I’m going to be an honorary auntie.”
Ten minutes later, I was back in the living room, staring at two positive tests sitting on the coffee table in front of me.
“This wasn’t the plan,” I said weakly. As if it mattered. As if the plan I had for my life had anything to do with the reality of my situation.
Ruby sat beside me on the couch, and she reached over to take my hand. “How do you feel about this?”
I let out a humorless laugh. How do I feel?
“I have no idea how to answer that. I-I feel like an asteroid just hit Earth. Or like I was just hit by a bus. I don’t know…”
“That’s some violent imagery,” Ruby said, squeezing my hand.
“I’m just saying, my entire life just changed. I’m going to be a mom. Just this morning, I was a nurse in a complicated relationship and a wide-open future full of possibilities. I didn’t even know if I wanted kids at all. Now, I’ve got nine months to learn how to be a good parent.” I let out a shuddering breath. “Fuck, Ruby. How am I supposed to know how to do that? It’s not like I had good examples growing up.”
“But you won’t be alone. You’ll have me and your brothers to help you. And what about Ford?”
That was a good question. I’d have to tell him, of course, but how would he react to this news? We hadn’t even talked about a future together because the last six months had been made up of stolen moments and quiet evenings at home. I always felt as if we were waiting for the promotion to go through, and then we’d discuss where things were going between us.
Despite that, I’d completely fallen for him. I loved the man, and I had for a while, even though I’d never said it.
“I’ll have to talk to him, to see where his head’s at,” I said, placing a hand on my stomach.
I needed to tell him about the baby and about my feelings for him. It was time.
“You guys will figure it out,” Ruby said.
“Thanks for being here. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”
