Page 30 of Fortuitous Encounters

In desperation, he finally asked, “May we defer that question for the moment?”

“Certainly. Perhaps if you do not mind, you might help me with some easier questions. You are not expected back at Rosings for another three quarters of an hour at least.”

“Nobody at Rosings is even aware I am here. How would you know when I am expected?”

“Charlotte and I planned a contingency for this. If you came to the parsonage, she was to buy us one hour. I assure you, Charlotte is very reliable. Nobody will miss you. Consider yourself quite safe; we need not worry about propriety, as nobody but Hannah knows you are here, and she is completely trustworthy… or at least in this case she is, as she has not engaged any bets on this outcome.”

At a loss, Darcy asked, “You had a question?”

“Oh yes, can you tell me exactly which excuse Charlotte used for my absence? I could obviously wait for her to return, but I like to take care of things at first opportunity.”

“She mentioned a headache!”

Elizabeth jumped up, went to a desk on the side of the room, and brought back a small stack of papers, shuffled through until she found one near the top, and made a few more incomprehensible scratches, muttering to herself, “Maria! Maria! What are we to do with you? Will you never learn! I quite despair.”

“Do you mean the younger Miss Lucas?”

“Can you also tell me if she has spoken a word at Rosings yet?”

“To the best of my knowledge, she has not.”

“Well, that is something at least… although really, to get caught out on such a wager will not do.”

Darcy once again sought an explanation. “I fear you left me behind once again.”

“My apologies, sir. I digress… it is just that Maria is vexing me and I could not keep it to myself. I apologise most profusely.”

“Would you mind explaining that, as if to a child… a not particularly bright one?”

“Maria is sixteen, and she should be a much better gamester by now. We all despair. She does fine with challenges but is a complete muddle on odds and predicting behaviour. For example, I wagered that Charlotte would use a headache based on my knowledge of her. She is extremely clever, but lazy, so she will use a headache by preference rather than a more complex prevarication at least seven times out of ten. I depended on that. Maria should not have allowed me to catch her on that, or at the very least should have demanded better odds. I really must take the child under my wing, or maybe give her to Lydia… Yes, yes! That is it. Lydia is not fond of tutoring, but I will impose on her.”

“What do you mean by challenges?”

Elizabeth dug through the stack of papers, pulled out one, and showed it to him, although he could not read it any better than the previous lot. “Here it is. Louisa Golding bet her that she could not get through… what was it... Oh yes, here it is… nine visits to Rosings without saying a word. She has managed seven so far, which means she is doing tolerably well, do you not agree? Her doe-eyed look is sheer perfection.”

She looked at him expectantly—whether for agreement or understanding was unclear—so he simply nodded, exactly as he would if he understood her.

“You mentioned Miss Lydia?”

“She hates tutoring beginners, but really, since she is the best of us, she will simply have to do her duty! Yes, it is to be tutoring until Maria comes up to scratch. I am quite determined!”

More confused than ever, Darcy asked, “You say, Miss Lydia? Your youngest sister is the best of you?”

Elizabeth frowned in confusion, and then her expression cleared. “I apologise once again. I keep forgetting how little you know of our society. Lydia is the best of us. Her current fortune is nearly £500 more than mine. Do you know she had Mr Wickham measured down to his toes in less than a minute? She already had her strategy mapped out and was in process that day you and Mr Bingley met us in Meryton… do you remember that day?”

“How could I forget it?”

“It was a fairly ordinary day, aside from Lydia starting a new project.”

“Might you elaborate?” Darcy asked.

“My apologies again. I keep forgetting how little you—well, again my apologies.”

That said, she dug through her papers until she found another sheet and made a few marks. “Once again, I must beg your pardon. I have to keep track of how many times I go off on tangents you cannot understand without the appropriate background, as my mother and Lady Lucas have an ongoing wager about it. So far, Lady Lucas is ahead… now where was I… Oh yes, Mr Wickham. Since Lydia ascertained his nature first, she got to manage the project.”

“Miss Lydia? Project?”

“Do not tell me you let Lydia fool you with her bubbly imbecile routine! I am all astonishment! Really, sir, A poor gambler such as Mr Wickham will fall for that every time, but I thought a proficient gamesman such as yourself would see right through it! Perhaps she is better than I give her credit for—”