Page 101 of A Single Obsession

“You can’t continue in this way,” Georgiana said, a grim expression on her face. “It does you no good to mope because life has not worked out the way you wanted. If you don’t come out of the doldrums, I’ll send you home.”

Although she feared meeting Beau, if she returned to Hampshire, she would lose all hope of seeing him. “You wouldn’t?”

“I will, if you don’t cheer up,” Georgiana said, a touch of impatience in her voice.

“Easy for you to say.”

“You act as if you’re the only person in the world with heartache.”

“What do you know of a broken heart?” Eliza said, her temper rising at the lack of sympathy in her sister’s words, and sharpened because she knew they were true. “Everything has worked out all right for you.”

Georgie leapt to her feet and raced over to the window, but not before Eliza had seen the tears streaming down her face.

She was immediately contrite. She walked over to her sister and put her arm around her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Her sister hiccupped as she brought her emotions under control. “I’m not unsympathetic, Eliza. I know how blessed I am to be married to an honourable man who loves me. It’s just that…I hoped…I might be in the family way by now. I assumed it would be part of God’s will for my life that I would have children. It’s too early to despair, but every month, it is like a kick in the stomach when I discover I am not with child, and when I heard Frances had given birth to a boy, I…cried.”

Eliza took her sister’s hands in her own and squeezed them. “Oh, Georgie, I’m sorry. I’ve been so taken up with my own problems that I’ve been oblivious to yours.”

“And now I need to heed my own words and put them into practise,” she said, drying her eyes. “I must not give up on life because it is not working out the way I wanted.”

“Mother would tell us to be thankful for what we have.”

“Yes, she would, and I’m glad to have you here with me.”

“I’ll fetch Charlotte. Let’s go shopping.”

As Eliza focused on being a more supportive sister, the pain in her heart faded to a dull but consistent ache, and when Georgiana suggested accompanying them to a ball at Almack’s a few days later, she agreed.

It was not as if Beau would be there. Eliza knew how much he hated it. He had not even graced Almack’s with his presence when he had needed to find a wife.

Her assumption was wrong. As soon as she walked through the door, she caught sight of him dancing with Horrible Harriet Whitlow. All the pain came flooding back with full force. What was he doing here, dancing with her? Was he still being forced to find a wife?

Eliza remembered her suspicion that Beau had only called on her at his mother’s bidding. His presence here tonight seemed to confirm her fears. She had raced to set him free from his mother’s power, but she had failed. He was being controlled by Lady Harting as much as ever. Had she given up everything for nothing?

What little colour she had in her cheeks faded away at the sight of him dancing with Harriet, but it was her own fault. She had released him, and she had no right to feel jealous anymore.

She sat down beside Georgiana and the other chaperons, watching the dance, picking at her gloves until she was sure she would make a hole in them. How she wished she hadn’t come. Maybe going home to West Meon would be easier than seeing him fill her place at his side with Harriet, having barely paused for breath since she had called off their engagement.

An acquaintance of Georgiana’s came across to talk to her. Eliza paid no attention to their conversation until she heard her name being mentioned.

“I understand your sister won’t be Miss Merry for much longer. She is to be congratulated.”

The woman paused, hoping for some encouragement to continue.

“Have I been a little premature, Lady Castleford? I know it hasn’t been announced yet, but Lady Harting dropped a word in my mother’s ear, and I thought…”

Her words petered out as Georgiana looked down her nose at her. She stared at the woman for some moments in silence and then said, in a measured tone of voice, “You thought…?”

Despite her annoyance at the woman’s gossiping, Eliza struggled to bite back a laugh, seeing her sister give such a masterly set-down. She wondered who she had learned that from.

“Ah well. I did not mean to offend,” the woman said, her cheeks growing red with embarrassment. “I see Lady Jersey, pray excuse me.”

Georgiana pulled a face at her sister. “Our aunt has been eager to spread news of your engagement,” she whispered, “and not that it has ended.”

Eliza nodded. At least she was prepared now.

As the set finished, she thought with an inner sigh she would be obliged to dance the next. She glanced around, hoping to see Anthony. Instead, she spotted Beau making his way across the room toward her.