Page 160 of The Last Guardian

I frowned and whispered carefully, “Why is it worse than the others?”

“Zaid—his power burns. It boils from the inside; it’s wild, untamable. Lethal. But mine—” Nefeli stopped, closing her eyes for a moment. “Annihilates.” She looked down—falling in a place where I wasn’t sure I could reach her. “If the shadows touch you, you are erased from the world. Your soul is just—” She looked at me at last. “Nullified. As if you never existed.” She snorted. “I have in my hands the very thing that can expunge life.”

It hit me—the way she always tried to smile, to laugh, to live her life as if tomorrow could never be. Nefeli was fighting for her life against the power that was bestowed upon her at birth. Like her smile, her joy could one day be erased by her own hand.

“I try not to use it much,” Nefeli said, her fingers playing together, “but when the emotions are too strong, the shadows are wilder.”

I looked at her—really looked at the woman in front of me. My friend. And I murmured gently, “You are using it to kill monsters, Nefeli.”

“Having the power to erase existence—even a monster’s—is not balance. It’s control. My own father wanted to use me for this.” Then Nefeli shook her head, her lips curling, a smile appearing on her face, and for the first time, I realized how much that smile hid. “Please, can we talk about something else?” she breathed, her eyes begging me.

Even if my instinct urged me to reach for her, to know more and help her, the way her eyes pleaded broke me. I understood the need to grasp onto anything but your own demons, so I nodded.

Nefeli resumed. “We’ve been training a lot with your brothers and Lyra,” she explained, taking a slice of bread and biting it. “I think she’s starting to like me a little, but she’s still distant. I managed to make her laugh a few times when I bickered with Arthur.”

I giggled, a big smile on my lips. “You can’t do better to win her heart. Insulting Arthur is worth all the love letters in the world for her,” I joked, and added, “If she’s distancing herself, it’s not against you; it’s mainly to protect those she cares about and make sure you’re all trustworthy,” I explained with a gentle smile. “She’ll soften eventually.”

“We’ll see.” Nef shrugged, taking a deep breath and leaning back in her chair. “Zaid’s been brooding since the attack.”

My traitorous heart skipped a beat at the mention of his name, and Nefeli smiled at me, glancing at my chest. Damn them with their super-hearing thing.

“This morning was the first time he came to talk to me since then. I was already preparing your tray to bring it to you. In fact, it was he who suggested bringing you some chocolate.”

I stopped chewing, my jaw falling. Nefeli laughed out loud at my reaction, my cheeks flushed red.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you?” Nefeli grimaced, touching a strand of hair innocently. “Oh gods, I talk too much. I’m so sorry.”

I snorted—Nefeli knew exactly what she was doing. She took my hand, her fingers tightening on my skin.

Zaid hadn’t visited once since the attack. Every time someone knocked on the door, a rush of feeling coursed through my veins at the thought of him. But it was never him.

I smiled at her. “At least one of you two is talking to me.” The fabric of my tunic rode up my arm as my hand squeezed hers.

She let out a soft laugh, glancing down at our joined hands, and a frown creased her face. “What is it?” Nef asked, turning my wrist and staring at the still-visible mark on my skin.

“Oh,” I replied, looking at my wrist too. “I don’t know. It appeared on the anniversary of my mother’s death. ”

“It… Does it hurt? It’s swollen.”

“No. It’s clearly not⁠—”

A knock interrupted my sentence.

“Alyana?” Arthur said, opening the door slightly. His soft brown eyes stared at me, as if I were a ghost. His beard had grown, and dark circles had settled under his eyes.

Nefeli cleared her throat; her eyes looked at the mark again, like the thing upset her. “I have to go. I need to—” She stopped and rose from her chair. “I will see you tomorrow. Get some rest!” She gave me a smile. Nefeli went to the door, and she and Arthur exchanged a hard look just before she disappeared outside.

Arthur stood on the threshold, his shoulders tense, staring at me. His eyes held a mixture of fear and relief.

I gave him a broad, genuine smile, my eyes shining with tears that streamed down my cheeks.

Arthur smiled back, letting out a sigh of relief, and quickly came to the table, approaching me. His arms wrapped around me in a matter of seconds, and he pulled me close, his cheek against mine. I didn’t have time to get up.

“I am so glad you are awake,” Arthur murmured in my ear, his arms around me, and I hissed in pain. At that, he wanted to pull away from the hug, but I held him. “I am sorry I haven’t visited earlier.”

For several moments, we remained like that, in utter silence, enjoying this moment of peace together. I felt a warmth against my cheek, and I pulled back to look at my brother.

“I’m okay,” I said, smiling and turning to face him. I pulled away from his embrace.