Page 66 of The Vow

Rounding a corner, I could see a woman sitting on a marble bench. She wore a blanket over her shoulders making her look meek, and frail. There was no way to make a surprise entrance. It was too quiet not to hear someone approaching, especially if that someone rode in on two wheels. I would never be the white knight on a stallion.

The blanket fell from her shoulders when she stood. She turned as white as a ghost, maybe believing she was seeing one.

“Alex.” It was all I could manage to say without crying.

“What... what are you doing here?”

She was more beautiful than I remembered, and ten times sadder. “I wanted to meet the other man who loves you with all his heart.”

She didn’t try to hide the fact that she was crying. Even from ten feet away, I could see she was trembling. “It’s been months.”

“I know. And I realized that there are no pictures of us. We need pictures.”

Crossing her arms, she paced in front of her husband’s crypt. “I don’t understand. And I don’t know what you want me to say. How did you find me?”

“Nick. He brought me here. Perdonami, Alex.”

“What does that mean?”

Many times, she’s asked me to translate Italian. This time, once she learned what the word meant, it would be a covenant between us. “It means forgive me. Forgive me for everything. I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I’ll earn it, if you that’s what you want. I’ll earn your trust back. I know everything you did for us was a sacrifice, and I had no right to judge you. I understand that now. As difficult as it was to understand, I finally got it through my thick head.” I was rambling, but I couldn’t stop myself. “God answered my prayers when you came into my life. And I’ve missed you. I’ve fucking missed you. I...”

“Stop. Please... stop.”

My fantasy dissolved before my eyes. It was too late. I was too late to win her back. “I don’t blame you for hating me. I promise that I won’t bother you again, because all I ever wanted was for you to be happy. Can I ask you one thing? Can I take one thing with me? You were going to tell me something before the last fight. I asked you to wait until the fight was over. What were you going to tell me?”

Her sobs echoed throughout the mausoleum. I watched as she bent over at the waist and held her knees. Her hair covered her face as she did. We all wear masks. “I was going to tell you what I could never tell Simon. I was going to tell you that I loved you. I was going to say, ‘I love you.’”

My heart was pounding out of my chest. I held my breath to stifle the opposite of a prayer. I wanted to curse God, but I was the only one at fault. Strong men do cry and I let the tears fall. This place has housed a million tears. “I’ve been so fucking stupid.”

“You’re not allowed to do that. You’re not allowed to do this to me! For weeks, I thought you’d come to me. I worried about you constantly. It was Nick who told me you were leaving him messages because he saw how worried I was. He is a good man, Pip.”

“And I’m a bastard.” I reached around my neck to remove the crucifix.

“Keep it.”

“A souvenir?” I smirked and wiped my nose with my sleeve.

“No. You didn’t let me finish. I loved you then, and I love you still.”

The months I spent suffering became insignificant, but if she was inviting me back into her world, I needed to know without a shadow of a doubt. “Do you need a roommate?”

For a full two minutes, she said nothing. She simply stared at me like she was staring directly at my soul. Then, for the second time, she changed both our lives. “I do need a roommate. I was circling want-ads this morning.”

With those words, I was reborn. Leaning over, I grabbed a folding cane that was hiding in the accessory pouch of my wheelchair and used it to support myself. I’ve practiced hundreds of times, not only to increase my strength, but because I wanted to prove to the world that sometimes, we can make our own miracles happen and our destiny isn’t shaped by tragedy.

I was like a fawn standing unsteadily on two legs. I was looking down at them, willing them not to fail me. When I looked up, I saw that Alex’s hands were covering her mouth. Her head shook in disbelief, and as I took three shaky steps, she fell to her knees.

“My God. How!?”

“I’ve been in rehab all this time. I was misdiagnosed. I have Incomplete Paraplegia. Initially, I had temporary spinal shock and inflammation, but most of all...”

Alex slowly stood, and walked towards me, mimicking my subtle movements. “Most of all what?”

“I wanted to hold you again while on my own two feet.”

Standing before me, our noses touching, we held each other up because love isn’t one-sided, and in the face of sickness, or even mortality, love doesn’t die. One day, when we’re gone, we leave a legacy behind because those who love us will never forget us. I would never again squander any moments with the love of my life, and never again would I forsake Alex.

“I have dreamed of this moment so many times.”