Page 50 of Burning Rivalry

Brutal but fair. I liked her more. She was protective of somebody we both loved. “I want to make it right.”

“At this point, nothing short of showing up in person and getting on your knees would do.”

Of all times for one of my sister’s favorite sayings to come to mind. I had rolled my eyes at it more times than I could count, but it was the only thing that fit now. “Say less.”

She wanted somebody on their knees? I could do that.

I had no choice because I needed her.

When the cab rolled up in front of Hadley’s apartment building, it was five in the morning Manhattan time. People were already out and about, heading to the gym or work, or walking their dogs. The city was truly a whole other world.

Hadley had assured me Claudia would be up. “She’s still on Vegas time,” she told me when I confirmed my plans to charter a private jet and fly out. “I swear, she haunts this apartment all night long. I love her, but you’re costing me sleep,” she concluded. I would have to find a way to pay her back, just as I would have to pay her back for colluding with me.

At the moment, nothing mattered as much as getting the hell out of the cab and upstairs after spending hours ready to burst out of my skin with desperation. Hadley had told the front desk staff that I would be arriving. I appreciated the fact that I had to show ID before they would let me onto the elevator, which took me up to the sixth floor.

As per my instructions, I knocked softly on the door. My pulse was pounding, my palms sweating. It all hinged on this—getting her to listen to me rather than shut me out.

The knob turned, the door swung open, revealing a small apartment with a terrific view through the windows opposite where I stood.

It was the view of Claudia’s wide eyes and pale face that meant more, even when she grimaced. “Motherfucker,” she whispered. Her head snapped around so she could glare at Hadley. “You traitor.”

“How am I being a traitor by inviting someone to my apartment, where I pay the rent?” she countered, closing her bathrobe around herself.

I stepped into the living room, unable to tear my eyes away from the woman in front of me. I had to make up for lost time, soaking in the sight of her. “Hi,” I offered, accepting how she scoffed softly, staring at the floor.

“I’m going back to bed,” Hadley announced, yawning loudly. “Try to keep it down out here.”

“We are going to talk about this tomorrow,” Claudia warned.

“It is tomorrow,” Hadley reminded her, blowing a kiss and leaving the room. I waited until her door closed to turn to Claudia, drinking in the sight of her, savoring the smell of the air when she was this near. She changed everything, made it better. No way was I leaving here without her.

“I have nothing to say to you.” Her voice shook but not half as hard as her body. I’d done that. I am the reason she’s hurting. “Do you think this is going to change anything?”

“I’m hoping it will. I fucked up.”

“No shit. You hurt me. You treated me like I was nothing, and I’m supposed to want to look at you?” She turned away, walking to the window where the city lights cast her in a silhouette. Every golden strand of hair shone, stirring a yearning deep in my heart. I needed to touch her. I needed her.

“I will never forgive myself.”

“Well. That makes everything better, doesn’t it?” she spat. “I’m glad I helped you grow or something.”

I refused to give up. I had to believe she still felt something. “Would you please hear me out?” I whispered, keenly aware of Hadley being mere feet away. Something told me she hadn’t actually gone to sleep. More likely, she was waiting by her door, listening like any best friend would.

“You came all this way,” Claudia muttered, lifting a shoulder with her back still turned toward me. “Say what you came to say. But don’t expect it to get you anywhere.”

I’d had hours to think about this. Now, at the moment, my tongue was thick and clumsy, my thoughts flying in all directions. There was only one thing I could say to sum up everything in my heart. “I love you.”

She flinched, wrapping her arms tighter around her trembling, pajama-clad body. If only she would turn around. If I could see her face and she mine, she would know I meant it. “Is that all?” she whispered.

“What else is there? I was wrong. I was stupid. I didn’t give you a chance, and it was the biggest… worst mistake I’ve ever made. You deserve better than that. And I am so desperately sorry.”

She took a deep breath, her shoulders rising and falling. “I accept that. I accept your apology. I said things I shouldn’t have said too. It was mean. I wasn’t thinking about anything but wanting to get back at you because you…” Something suspiciously close to a strangled sob burst out of her. “You broke my heart. You wouldn’t give me a chance to tell you I never wanted to leave. I knew it for sure that night. Everything was so clear. I’ve never had anything with anyone like I had with you. I never felt so alive. Connected.”

Forcing a shaky breath, she concluded, “And then, after everything we shared, you turned around and shut the door in my face all because you wouldn’t bother to ask what I was thinking.”

The truth of her words reverberated in me. I deserved all of it and more. “I don’t know what to say except to tell you I’m a hopeless asshole. I was too proud to admit the idea of losing you was unthinkable.”

When she began to turn toward me, my heart almost burst out of my chest. If she would look at me, it meant she cared. I hadn’t lost her. There was still something inside her that wanted me. “How could you hurt me like that? That’s what I don’t understand.”