Page 35 of Howlin’ For You

It’s a little weird that I’m bringing up work, but nerves have flooded my system. Is he coming inside? Is he leaving? Are we going to stand in an awkward stalemate as we try to decide?

I want him to come inside. At least…I wanted him to come inside when we were at the café.

In multiple ways.

“I’d like to make you dinner tomorrow after I build the stage. Can that be put on my schedule?” he asks, a little nervousness in his tone.

My heart does a little somersault in my chest. “Yeah, I’ll squeeze it in.”

I linger on the welcome mat—moment of truth.

He kisses my palm and closes my hand over it in a move that has me practically swooning. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Izzy.”

He’s not even going to try to stay? Disappointment lances through me like a knife. I’m not sure what I would’ve said if he actually asked, but it almost feels like…like maybe the shine’s worn off and he’s seeing that I’m just Izzy. Not what he thought I’d be. Not what he wanted. Not good enough.

Something I’m all too familiar with.

“Hey.” He lifts my chin with two fingers, but I staunchly refuse eye contact. He’s not responsible for my emotions. “Don’t shut off from me. What did I do?”

Yeah, Izzy. What did he do? He’s probably just trying to have some respect for you, and you’re being all weird.

I heave a heavy breath full of lifelong trauma I haven’t addressed as well as I probably should have. “It’s nothing. We all have our weird triggers, right?”

“Yeah,” he huffs, taking my hand once more. “And I want to know yours, so I don’t hurt you.”

I smile at him—this genuinely kind, beautiful man—and lift my other hand to his bearded cheek. “We’re going to trigger each other accidentally, that’s just part of being close to people. But this? The way you care and respond, that’s what makes the difference.”

“You know I want to come in, right? You know I want to finish what we started in the café. I want you, Izzy.”

His reassurance is everything. It warms my belly like a cup of hot cocoa. “Then why don’t you?”

“Because.” He gently squeezes my hand. “I’m taking this seriously. I want to give you time to process what we talked about tonight. I want to give myself time, too.”

It’s the mature thing to do. It’s what I’d normally want to do. It’s very much what I don’t want to do. Ugh, my head is a jumbled-up mess of sex and responsibility.

“Okay.” I give him a soft smile. “I’m looking forward to dinner tomorrow. What can I bring?”

His face lights up, an infectious thing that catches fire in my chest. “You. That’s all I need.”

The words send me falling back into our comfortable, safe bubble, and silence the ache in my heart. “Charmer.” I smile. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

I watch Nick walk away until he’s a little dot in the darkness. I wasn’t expecting to find him here in Lunamois, and there’s still a part of me that’s scared getting tangled up with someone will make leaving all the more difficult.

But what if you don’t leave? Whispers a tiny voice in my brain. What if you stay here with Nick, Georgie, and all the others, building a life you love? Would that really be so bad?

It wouldn’t be bad at all.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

NICK

Walking away from Izzy last night was the hardest goddamn thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. That moment of insecurity outside her door at the end of the night almost broke me.

I could barely contain the rage underneath my skin at the thought of someone convincing this beautiful woman that she’s unwanted. Not good enough.

Even now, as I hammer nails into the stage, it rips a growl from deep in my chest.