Page 135 of Cross Ice

“I understand why it feels that way. But what you’re actually doing is reading things you can’t change, written by people who don’t know you, and letting them tell you who you are.” He paused. “That’s not intelligence gathering. That’s just pain.”

That landed in a way I didn’t expect. “Okay,” I said. “What else?”

“You need to decide what you’re willing to share publicly and what you’re not. Some partners go visible—they post photos, they own the story, they show up at events and lean into it. Other people keep everything private and just live their lives. Neither is wrong. But you have to decide, not just drift into one or the other.”

“I don’t want to post about us online.”

“Then don’t. But that means accepting that other people will. Paparazzi, fans, anyone who spots you. You can’t control what they put out. You can only control what you put out yourself.” He paused. “And that’s actually a useful principle for everything. Ask yourself what you can control, and focus only on that. The rest is going to happen regardless.”

“And when someone recognizes me in public? Wants a photo?”

“You say no if you don’t want to or yes if you don’t mind. But you don’t owe anyone access to you just because you’re dating someone public. You’re not a public figure. You’re a private person who got caught in someone else’s visibility.” He said it plainly, without drama. “You’re allowed to just be a person.”

I sat with that for a moment. I’d been saying it for weeks and it had sounded like an excuse every time. Coming from someone in Nico’s world, it sounded like a fact.

“The other thing,” Wesley continued. “Is maintaining the parts of your life that have nothing to do with any of this. Your own friendships, your own work, your own space where you’re just Evan. Not Nico’s partner, not the guy in the parking lot photos. Just yourself.”

“Danny,” I said again.

“Exactly. Don’t let that go. That’s what keeps you grounded when everything else is loud.”

“What about my business?” I asked. “I’ve lost five clients. My professional reputation is tied to articles about gold digging. I can’t just wait for people to lose interest.”

“No, you can’t. So let’s talk about that.” He shifted forward. “I’ve done my research into your situation. You’ve already started the search result work… updated case studies, professional content, rebuilding what comes up when someone googles you. That’s right. Keep doing it.”

“I sent the first case study to my web designer three weeks ago. I’ve been posting on LinkedIn. I’m working on a bylined piece for a marketing publication.”

“Good. That’s exactly right. Professional visibility and personal visibility are different things. Posting marketing insights establishes expertise. Posting about your relationship or engaging with gossip feeds the story. So the line is simple: professional content only. You’re Evan Beckett, marketing consultant. That’s the only version of you that exists in public.”

“What about the clients who paused contracts? The ones I haven’t formally lost yet.”

“Have you reached out to them?”

“Yes. Sent emails this week. Direct, not defensive—acknowledged the situation, refocused on results, listed specific metrics.” I paused. “One already responded. Wants to set up a call.”

“Good. That’s the move. You’re not apologizing for your relationship. You’re reminding them you’re excellent at your job.” He nodded. “What did the others say?”

“Nothing yet.”

“Give it time. Some of them are waiting to see how you handle this before they decide. The fact that you reached out professionally, without drama, is itself the answer to their question.”

“Media requests,” I said, moving on. “I’ve gotten a dozen.”

“Ignore all of them. You’re not a public figure. You don’t owe reporters comment on your personal life.” He was unequivocal about this. “If they’re persistent, one line: ‘I’m a private citizen and my personal life is not available for discussion.’ That’s it. Don’t elaborate, don’t explain, don’t apologize. One sentence and you’re done.”

“And if they publish something anyway?”

“They probably will. You don’t respond to that either. Every response is fuel. Your silence is not an invitation, it’s a boundary. Let it stand.”

I nodded slowly.

“Have you thought about which clients to go after next? Once the noise starts dying down?”

“Some. LGBTQ-owned businesses. Clients who’ve dealt with public fallout.” I hesitated. “But I feel like I’d be exploiting the situation.”

“You understand what happens when media turns on someone’s personal life. You’ve lived through brand damage you didn’t cause. That’s not exploitation. That’s expertise you didn’t have six months ago. Use it.”

I hadn’t thought about it that way.