Page 58 of The Best I Never Had

Thea’s scoff near the end of the movie breaks me out of my trance. Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey are reuniting on a bridge, and Thea can’t stop rolling her eyes.

“Don’t believe in love?” I ask, trying to keep my voice low, and when no one nearby yells at me, I assume I’ve succeeded.

Her mouth quirks up. “Not after less than two weeks, I don’t.”

“Really?” I face her fully, unable to stop my gaze from trailing down her elegant neck to the place where her pulse beats.

She doesn’t look at me, but there’s just enough light from the screen to see a blush come over her checks. It’s adorable and new for my self-assured Thea. “Yes, really. They don’t know each other. A couple weeks isn’t enough time to see all the different sides of someone, and how can you love them without knowing all of them?”

“I don’t know if I agree with that,” I say. “You can know the core of who someone is in a few days. All the rest of it is just extra.”

A terrifying thought crosses my mind—that it’s only been three days with Thea back in my life and I could already see myself falling in love with her—but I’m sure it’s the alcohol talking. Tomorrow, when I’m sober, I’ll remember this is just attraction disguised as more.

She looks at me, raising a brow. “Are you telling me you’ve fallen in love in a week?”

I scoff. “I’m telling you I think it’s possible. I’ve never fallen in love, period.”

The shock on her face embarrasses me, like the fact that I’ve never been in love is a character flaw. And maybe she’s right. I’m in my thirties and have never found anyone who stuck around long enough for us to fall in love. She must be cataloguing my red flags as we speak.

I tried to date more when I was younger. My girlfriends always found it cute how much I took care of Harrison or were amazed that I already owned my own company, but that wore off. They’d get annoyed with how much time I spent on my family, would tell me that my life was too boring, and they wanted more excitement. I may let myself indulge in the fantasy of Thea, but it would end the same way with her. She’s the most exciting woman I’ve ever met, and I’d eventually lose her.

She meets my gaze, and I brace myself.

“I’ve never fallen in love, either,” she says, and I feel like I’ve been bowled over. How could this incredible woman not have found love?

I keep my drunk tongue from saying, I could love you, and instead say, “That’s a shame. You deserve love, Thea.”

For a second, she looks as stricken as I feel, but then she turns back to the screen like the conversation never happened. And I go back to daydreaming about a future that won’t exist.

Chapter 18

THEA

The next afternoon, after a morning of avoiding Owen and all my complicated feelings, Addy pulls me into her room with an excited squeal. She throws her body against the inside of the door, her back landing with a thud as she smiles at me with a bit of mania in her eyes.

“My dress was just delivered after the last round of alterations,” she says, giving a little jump.

I let out an uncharacteristic squeal myself. “Can I see it? Please?”

It wrecked me when she went wedding dress shopping without me, even though I understood she was on a time crunch and couldn’t wait for me to have an evening off work. That pain eased a bit when she told me how excited she was to show me. It won’t feel like my dress until you see me in it.

Her body shakes like she’s undergoing an exorcism. “Yes!”

Addy pulls the garment bag out of the bathroom, her body folding under the weight, but she gets it hung from the edge of the closet. A burst of tulle and lace flies out as she unzips it, but once the silhouette settles, I can see how perfect it is. An A-line ball gown with a lace overlay. The sweetheart neckline will be gorgeous on her, and the sheer lace sleeves give it a classic look. If someone had sent me into the nicest wedding dress store in the world with an unlimited budget, this is still what I’d have picked out for her.

I blink back tears as I help her into the dress, doing up the three thousand exposed buttons that run from the top of her butt to the nape of her neck. I step up behind her, my height giving me an inch on her, even with her wedding heels on.

“Addy, you’re perfect,” I whisper, swatting away the tear that managed to escape my blinking.

“You think so?” she asks, her voice low to match mine, like neither of us wants to share this moment, even with the silence around us.

“Yes, but wait one minute. I have something for you in my room. Don’t move.”

I sprint down the hall to grab the present I wasn’t willing to give her in front of everyone. I dig the jewelry box out of my suitcase and sprint back. She hasn’t moved an inch when I get back, staring in the mirror and running a hand over the lace like she needs to prove it’s real.

I step behind her again, meeting her gaze in the mirror as I bring the box in front of her. Her brows pull together as a small smile plays on her beautiful face, but she gently takes the box from my hands.

“For your something blue,” I say, my body buzzing with nervous excitement.