Page 20 of Ship Happens

“Piper, if it’s a girl.” She hesitates. “Abigail and I have already talked about it.”

“And if it’s a boy?” Owen teases.

She scoffs, holding her stomach tenderly as if she’s already showing. “Come on, we’re having a girl. I can tell.”

Owen’s heart flutters. “What if they’re trans, huh?” he jokes.

“Well, then that’ll be your responsibility to help figure out, not mine. So long as she doesn’t name herself . . . Kai.”

“I told you that in confidence!” Owen bemoans, forced to think back to the most cringe-inducing parts of his early transition. “I think Jacob’s more excited than either of you are,” Owen says to her plainly, unsure of why he’s steering things back to Jacob.

“I saw him google ‘How to be a good uncle’ before bed,” Kaitlyn says, a smile on her face as she shakes her head.

They’d discussed kids before, he and Jacob. Not seriously, not until they were on the bus one day, a few months into their relationship. A woman with a stroller sat across from the two of them, and Jacob spent the entire ride downtown entertaining the baby. Playing peek-a-boo, making funny faces to get them to laugh. Owen remembers staring at him, wide-eyed, heart melting in that very specific way that comes with finding out the perfect man is great with children on top of everything else that Owen already loved about him.

The line at Buck’s is nearly empty in the early morning. Owen grabs a bottle of Ritual coffee from the refrigerator, Kaitlyn ordering their usual: one chocolate éclair and one blueberry cake donut.

“Can I ask you something?” Owen prompts as they exit the bakery, Kaitlyn immediately opening the box to grab her pastry. Owen twists the top of his coffee open. “And I think I want the truth.”

“You think?” Kaitlyn eyes him, chewing slowly.

“I think,” Owen starts to say, wondering how this could possibly be the right thing to do. He shouldn’t ask, it’s none of his business. But he goes for it anyway. “How was Jacob? After the breakup.”

“A mess.” Her voice is quiet after a second of hesitation. “He called me crying, saying that you wanted to end things. That the distance was too much.”

Owen doesn’t appreciate how much of the blame seems to have been placed on him.

“He asked me if he should reject the offer, get on the first plane to SFO, and work things out with you in person.”

Owen pauses mid-chew. “Did he really ask that?”

“You cannot tell him that I’m telling you this.” Kaitlyn walks back the conversation, her words pointed firmly at Owen.

“I won’t.”

“I’m serious. If I find out you said something, I’ll tell everyone about your AO3 account.”

“So?” He shrugs. “Hailey and I send fics to each other all the time.” He doesn’t even post on that account. He just bookmarks and hands out kudos.

Kaitlyn cocks an eyebrow. “The other account.”

Owen’s blood runs cold. “How do you—”

“I have my ways. Don’t you say a word.”

“I swear.” Owen holds up his hand. “What did you say to him? When he asked you what he should do?”

“I told him that he needed to follow his gut. I didn’t want to make it seem like an ultimatum, like he only had two choices.”

“Didn’t he?” Owen asks her. “Either stay or go.”

“I don’t know,” she says. “I feel like it’s more complicated than that.”

Owen feels a flash of frustration before it settles. How could she really understand? This wasn’t her relationship. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” But how can the issue be complicated? Either stay or leave.

“I know,” she says. “As far as I’m concerned, you’re both idiots.” These words come out lighter, like she wants Owen to know she’s not insulting him. Well, not exactly.

“What does that mean? He had a decision, he made it. What was I supposed to do?” he asks her, trying to keep his voice down. “I couldn’t go with him to North Carolina. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to go overseas.” The idea of bouncing from country to country, never having the chance to settle down anywhere and get comfortable—even just the thought of it makes Owen fidget, pressing the nail of his index finger against his thumbnail.