Page 35 of The Build-a-Boyfriend Project

Peter takes a pregnant pause. “Right . . .”

“But you’re correct. A pull-out clause might be useful. Who knows, emotions might be flying high. And we’re literally going to pretend to be boyfriends and do boyfriend things. It might be easy to get confused.”

“And if I find a date, or I meet a person,” Peter begins to say. “I don’t want them to think that you’re someone to be worried about.”

“You’re right, you’re right.” Eli notes the rule. It’s a fair one; being the third wheel could scare away any potential suitors that might catch Peter’s eye.

“What kind of dates would we go on?”

“Uh, dinner. Movies. We could go to the park, or . . .” Eli thinks, having to remember what actual dates feel like. “A cooking class?”

Peter chuckles. “I actually tried a cooking class, to meet people. I caused a fire.”

“Seriously?”

Peter nods. “I forgot that you can’t put water on a grease fire. They banned me from any future classes at the center.”

“Peter . . .” Eli can’t resist the laugh that slips out, which makes Peter laugh too.

“It’s not funny!” he argues, still smiling.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.” Eli can’t stop himself, though.

“People could’ve died.”

“I’m sorry.” Eli hides his face. “See, where was this on Friday?” He can already sense Peter’s ease. There’s a relaxation that wasn’t there Friday night.

“I . . . I don’t know. I guess I find it easier to talk to you since you’ve seen the bad parts of me.”

“That’s the kind of self-awareness that we’re looking for, I think.”

“So . . .” Peter starts to say. “Where do we start? With my . . . rehabilitation?”

“Finding a better name for it, for starters.” Eli sits back in the booth, crossing his arms across his chest.

This has to be the biggest hurdle to climb over in this entire scheme. Eli isn’t a big fan of it either—in all the rom-coms he’s watched, fake dating always leads to muddy feelings, people falling in love. Not that Eli has to really worry about that.

Then it comes to him in a sudden burst, so obvious. Eli smiles. “But I have an idea.”

Peter stares at Eli, his eyebrows raised. “Which is?”

Chapter Five

13 Going on 30, dir. by Gary Winick

“And you actually want to do this?” Patricia sits on Eli’s bed once again, Eli adjusting the collar of his button-down shirt where it showed from under the sweater, careful of his hair.

All week, he’d spent his free time organizing his thoughts, writing out the throughlines of the articles that he wants to follow, questions to ask Peter, where he’d even start with writing two entirely different stories for Michael.

“He asked me to give him another shot,” Eli tells her as he wrestles with his hair once again. Rose is out, having stayed late at school to finish up her lesson planning for the next week, meaning that Eli’s been left alone to tame the wild mess that sits on top of his head.

He has his father to thank for that. Despite balding late in his thirties, David Francis had sported a nest of thick black hair through most of his young adult years. Pre-transition, Eli’s hair had been just as thick, but more wavy than curly, and much easier to control.

Truthfully, he hadn’t believed all the things he’d heard from other trans people about the effects of testosterone. How could your hair magically become curly? How was it possible for your body odor to change? How could you magically become gay?

And yet, that hadn’t stopped it from happening. At least the first two; the most drastic change with Eli’s sexuality was having to reckon that his attraction to men was of the homo variety and not the hetero kind, which was its own wild battle.

Even now, in a place where Eli considers himself well into his transition, it’s haunted him just how much he looks like his father. The same thin frame, the same pasty-white skin that burns after just minutes in the sun, the same sharp angle of the nose and shape of his eyes.